“At age 20, we worry about what others think of us. At age 40, we don’t care what they think of us. At age 60, we discover they haven’t been thinking of us at all.”
Ann Landers
This his my 5th Blogging A-Z. After each year I’ve said, never again. But here I am and this time I’m going to theme my posts around age, agism and in fact all things age. I’m soon to begin my 60th year and so it feels appropriate. The posts will be about some of the challenges, but also about the positive aspects of getting older. Some will be about sex and relationships, others on more broad topics. I also plan to share some of the work of fellow, slightly older writers and bloggers.
One minute you are 20 and then suddenly nearly 60
There is no doubt that as we age the hours and the days seem to spin more quickly. I definitely feel that the past 7 years spent in the company of Master have gone more quickly than the previous 7. Or maybe it is that we have been busy (well before last year). Filling our lives with things other than work, children and regular home stuff.
I’ve also had the best sex of my life since I’ve been 50. Better than I could have imagined possible. It’s funny because when I was 20 I never even imagined 60 year olds had sex. As the quote above suggests, I was worried about doing it right and now I know that very few people are bothered with what I get up to. I have no doubt I’m doing it right now and that all along I worried about the wrong things.
Dealing with older age
Not that long ago my mum told me that the dress I was wearing was too short. No doubt that’s the kind of thing people told her when she was in her 50’s. Not that she listened to them any more than I listened to her. Having said that I do like to dress according to a situation and that means dressing up as well as down. I’m not as good in heels as I was, they make my feet hurt. Of course they always did but I’m now more a fan of comfort over style.
Equally people can wear their hair as they wish, I happen to have discovered that mine suits me better short. Plus Master likes it that way. I am still dying it, mainly because the spread of grey is uneven. But I apply a lighter colour because it matched my eyebrows better. I’m now almost blond at times and we all know that blonds have more fun!
Dealing with ageism
I’m lucky in that I work in a profession where those over 50 outnumber those under. This means there is still work on offer, because the experience is like me, older. But it is also a bad thing because at some point soon the health service will lose a lot of their workforce.
In other industries though you are considered old at 50 or even 40. Especially if you no longer want the pressure that successive promotions have brought. Master found this in his career and took early retirement as a consequence. Fellow bloggers have written about rejections based on their age. Apparently a 40 year old can’t appeal to 20 somethings but no doubt a 30 year old is ok to write about getting old. Molly wrote this post a couple of years ago about this very issue.
I’ll be returning to all these topics over the course of the month.
Interesting topic, with loads to write about. I do believe that swx gets better as we age…and yes, at 20, I wouldn’t have imagined 60-year-olds having sex. Now that I’m 45, I totally can. Looking forward to your posts.
I can related to some of what you said. And I’m of the belief that there is no “right” way to wear a dress or your hair or whatever at any age, as long as it is appropriate to you, the occasion and makes you feel confident.
I’m almost 50 and I’m in minis, shorts, flip flops when it suits me, and I’ve also been lucky in that i still have my job (in healthcare!) despite landing it at 45. I was the first person they hired over 30. Would you believe it?
Everyone else there was 20something. Thankfully there are 2 other people there in the ‘older’ person age group now. Perhaps they realised we could bring something to the table that the infants could not. 🙂
Looking forward to the rest of your posts.
I certainly can relate…one minute we’re 20 and the next those hips don’t fit into our old jeans. Check out how I plan to Aging Gracefully
Good luck in the challenge and I’m glad you decided to come back and join the adventure again.
Cheers,
Crackerberries
It’s nice to see you — so glad you’re playing! 🙂
I think this is a great topic. We make all kinds of presumptions based on age — I see it in both directions — and the way we see things definitely changes over time.
I will add your blog to my A-to-Z link list. I look forward to what the rest of April brings! 🙂
I love that this is going to be the theme for your posts… I think it is important to talk about aging and sex and careers as women in ways that we don’t normally in our culture!!
Cool topic! I’m in my 40’s, and yep. I no longer care what people think. But I do still think they’re thinking. Thank goodness that will be over in 20 years! 😀 To heck with how long your skirt is. You like it? Enjoy it! I’m at that stage, too. Have a happy #atozchallenge !
Thank you for the shout out Julie. I am fast approaching 50 which is wild as it feels like only a short while ago I was celebrating being 40. I used to worry about turning 50 but the closer it gets the more I am OK with it. I want to live the best life in this later years of my life
Molly
I love that Ann Lander’s quote. If only we could have it all figured out at 20 although then what would we have to learn? Weekends In Maine
Great topic! I turn 50 this year. Hooray! And I’m finding it to be a bit difficult with encroaching menokissmyass and feelings of invisibility. Can’t wait to read more. Good luck with the A-Z. Stop by if you get a chance, Urban Gypsy Girl. I’m adding you to my blog list.
Thanks for visiting, I certainly will be over to visit you.
So true–they’ve not been thinking of us at all, but only about themselves and worrying what others think of them. It’s a terrible loop 🙂 I so appreciate this topic and am glad to have found your blog. I’m writing about online dating during the pandemic for this years A to Z challenge. Last time I dated I was 37, twenty years ago! Things have aged!
Hi Pam, thanks for stopping by. You are so right things have changed A LOT!