New realities

Yesterday, we had sex. Spur of the moment, lustful afternoon sex. 

In the morning we woke in a large, but slightly chilly hotel room. Breakfast was served till 10, so even though we were both randy as hell, we deferred. We showered together, he lathered my body with soap and caressed my breasts. He held me and kissed me and bent forward to take my right nipple in his mouth.

I am feeling mighty odd about my right breast. The bruise from the biopsy has faded, but is just visible. The hardness inside, the cancer, remains for the moment. I look at my breasts in the mirror and think that the right one has changed shape. Perhaps, maybe. I am scared that after the operation I won’t feel like me any more. worse that he won’t want this new me. These are stupid and crazy thoughts, but they are real.

He loves my breasts

He calls them jugs, they belong to him, along with the rest of me and he loves them. Over 4 years ago, while our relationship was still new, I had my nipples pierced, for him. Also though for me, and we both love those piercings. Yesterday he took some photos, in the hotel room. He said what I was thinking, that we need to take photos now, just in case. In case I need a mastectomy and it doesn’t look the same. We have lots of photos of my breasts, many of them are on this blog, but knowing what is about to happen means we want more.

After breakfast we set off to a nearby city and wandered around the cathedral. As I wandered around, looking at the beautiful architecture, the stained glass, the tombs of clerics from centuries ago. I was struck by the peace of the place and could see how people might turn to the church and religion in times of need. I don’t have that feeling myself, but found the environment some how reassuring. A place where the fog can clear and the future, whatever it brings be faced. 

When we got home we had sex

Not straight away. He went off into his office to attend to some admin and sort through photos. I sat reading blogs, catching up on Twitter and responding to comments on here. Suddenly, he appeared in front of me. He asked what I was doing and without really waiting for an answer he unzipped his trousers. Moments later I had his cock in his mouth, it tasted very good. Slightly salty, warm and hard. My cunt throbbed a little. His cock filled my mouth.

We went upstairs and stripped off. On the bed, he ran his fingers over my slick vulva and proclaimed that I was turned on too. Damn right I was. He pushed slowly but surely inside and my body welcomed him. I needed this, wanted to feel him, to know that he wanted me. He moved in and out with ease, my body opening up like magic. My head cleared as it had in the church and I concentrated on him, his cock and his fingers. 

This wasn’t an epic sex session. A couple of orgasms for me, a change of position and he was coming inside me. But it was pure in the moment, carnal desire. I needed to know he still fancied me and he does. And what is more, I fancy him too and I don’t think that will change. I just need to remember that when things get tough. 

Good vibrations

Last weekend was beyond busy as we were in France getting my apartment there ready for the season. Master celebrated his birthday by painting the bathroom ceiling and putting together an Ikea sofa bed. There was of course time for fun, and we enjoyed a night out at the local bar where it was karaoke night. I gave him a couple of CDs from his amazon wish list on the day. The other present arrived while we were away. I gave it to him yesterday.

I saw the Hot Octopus Atom Plus at Eroticon but was undecided at the time. On the spur of the moment one evening a couple of weeks ago, I messaged them to see if I could get a discount. I was excited to learn that I could and sent off my order.

Vibration fun

He followed me into the spare room. I had wandered in there from the bathroom to see what the weather was like. It was raining. Soon though the only moisture I was worried about was that around my cunt. He started on my nipples, pinching and then sucking. Holding his cock in one hand, he requested I kneel. I asked if we could return to the bedroom, he agreed and I kneeled before him, taking his cock into my mouth. I worked him for a while before he said he wanted to feel my tongue must more. Of course I obliged, running it along his shaft and thing circling the tip of his cock. He told me he wanted me on top of him.

Climbing onto the bed, he reached for his new toy. Master’s cock has a large girth, often giving me quite a mouth full. The Atom Plus went on fine but was quite tight. He certainly couldn’t have fitted it over his balls too, which the instructions say should be the case. Anyway with the ring on and turned on, I climbed aboard his cock. I was wet already and guided him carefully into my cunt. Moving up and down now, I could feel the vibrations form the Atom Plus immediately. I wanted Master deep inside me now, I wanted my clit stimulated by this powerful vibrating toy. The feeling was amazing giving me the beginnings of a wonderful orgasm. There is a difference in the type of orgasms I can enjoy through direct clitoral stimulation. A vibrating toy directly onto my clit is the most powerful. After a slow build up inside my cunt, the tell tale throbbing of my clit and I was ready to let go. He permitted me to cum and very quickly I did.

Climbing off I asked him how it was for him, he said that the vibrations had been pleasant but he had enjoyed the effect on me most. A few minutes later he had orgasmed too, inside me, minus the ring. Happy girl, happy Master we were pretty satisfied.

Final thoughts on the Atom Plus

I think this will be a great toy for us to play with  much more. It is small and easily portable and easily charged. You can also use it in water, so it may be fun when we have use of a large jacuzzi bath.

The only down side is the size of the hole. A bit small for Master when fully erect, but he seems a bit pleased by this. He loves the idea that he has a bigger cock than average. Over all then, a successful birthday present and one that will go on giving.

 

A reconnection

The trip to Sicily was amazing, but it was busy. We walked and walked, often up hills or steps, and we saw so many amazing things. We drank wonderful beer and wine and ate some amazing meals. But most nights we fell exhausted into bed (often it was a different bed from the night before) and in the morning got up early enough to grab breakfast before moving onto the next wonderful place.

We had a lovely weekend in Agrigento, in an apartment. For 3 days we were able to come and go, eat and drink what and when we wanted (mainly simple breakfasts of fruit and yoghurt plus good coffee with hot milk!) and know that no one was going to want to come in and clean the room (or whatever). We had our busiest day while there, when we went to visit the Greek temples. It was hot and very sticky, and the day was a long one, we walked miles, including in the evening since the nearest restaurants were half an hour away (on foot, as we wanted to be able to have wine etc with dinner). The next day though, which was Sunday we went to the supermarket and bought food and wine for dinner so that after an afternoon of sightseeing we were able to grab some down time.
At the end of the following week we found ourselves at a wonderful, very classy hotel in Palermo. Here we experienced a little bit of luxury; lovely breakfasts over looking the sea, drinks and nibbles on the patio and a couple of hours by (and in) the pool. But the hotel was quite a way out of town so we needed to use the hotel shuttle or a taxi (as previously mentioned we only walked it once!) to go anywhere and once out in the morning preferred to stay out until after dinner.
We returned from holiday invigorated, and probably fitter. I put on 3lb, (probably due to beer, crisps, nuts and olives which we tended to eat at lunchtime since they came with the beer), but have already lost 2. The holiday was active, but not tiring even though we were busy. What we didn’t have much time for though was sex or any real opportunity to play. I mostly wore underwear, to prevent chafing and other effects of 30c (and higher) heat.

Then last weekend we were also busy with a concert on Saturday and then a friend visiting from Holland Sunday and Monday. We had a lovely time showing her more of London and on Sunday we had a lovely meal in a family run Italian restaurant, thank goodness such places still exist in London. The train home on both nights was around 11pm.

During the week we expressed our frustration about how the M/s side of things seemed to have been lacking for us both. For me it felt that I was failing as His slave in some way, and he expressed to me that perhaps he wasn’t doing his job as Master well. However the reality is that we are experiencing real life. You can’t have it, well not all of the time.
This weekend has been different. We have had plenty of time to spend having sex and in rediscovering my submission and His dominance. I have been on my knees for the first time in ages worshipping Master’s wonderful cock. There has been plenty of sex, many orgasms and a lot of time just reconnecting with each other. We have also had time to sit and do very little, I have left him to some clearing out while I went to the sales in town. He has cooked for us, and then we have walked to the pub. We have spent time talking about our holiday, remembering places, people and the wonderful things we did and saw.
We have taken tim to rebalance and reconnect and our relationship is all the better for the opportunity to do just that.

Valentines day

She was awake early; she had slept well and felt rested. The same was true for Him. Despite their busy Saturday and the fact that they had finished the night with cheese, wine and cocktails they were both alert.
She lay in bed beside Him just surfing and checking out her usual websites.
He did the same, though His involved some places that were far more erotic. He rubbed him self as He viewed what was on offer
He got up suddenly and walked around the bed, instructing her to get on her knees. 
Soon He was fucking her. Fucking her in such a way that she felt Him deep inside of her cunt. Fucking her in such a way that she knew that she was wetter than wet. 
He asked her who she was, what she was. Of course she is His slave, His slut and His cunt. 
she told him so. 
Master’s cock filled that worthless cunt and she knew there was no better way to start Valentines day. 
Who needs roses?

Kink of the week – Semen

As a few people have mentioned in response to this topic, we girls don’t always have a history of enjoying the experience of tasting or feeling our lover’s semen. But when the relationship is right and we are given the opportunity to know more about ourselves and our lover then this is one of the things we also come to enjoy. Such has been the case for me.

Before Master there was S and before that hubby. With hubby, for a reason i cannot explain, I found no pleasure in sucking cock or indeed in experiencing the warm damp feeling of his cum. I am not sure he enjoyed it himself, indeed perhaps he found it almost repulsive, something to consign to a tissue. Perhaps that is the clue.
With S, I was encouraged to enjoy his cock, which I did and to taste and feel his spunk. I did these things, as I knew it was what he wanted from me and gradually I began to enjoy.
Things with Master have moved on in spades though. I love the taste and feel of His cock and gradually I have learned to savour the different substances that emerge from it. The taste is not always perfect, it depends on what he has consumed in the day or so before. But it is always an interesting experience. Part of this is the fact that he has no fear of either of our bodily fluids, indeed he feels they are part of the overall experience of our sex life. But it is not all about taste, it is about feel and about being used about being his slave.
Early on in our relationship Master told me that he no longer wished me to shave. I had assumed this was something all Dominants wanted after my experience of S and reading blogs, fetlife and other websites. No, he wanted me to grow a cultured bush that he could use as a landing mat! It took both he and I by surprise that it took quite so many months to grow my bush back into any kind of hairy place, but that is what exists now. What is more, it is my eternal pride to say that Master loves the feel of that place so much the the touches it frequently when the opportunity arises.
Often I can see that he is considering where to shoot his load; my mouth, my cunt, arse, or indeed the silky fur (as he calls it) of my bush or some other place on my body. Where ever it goes it will be hot, salty or sweet and it will have that special smell that I have come to love, but we are middle aged people so this is a one off thing today, and he is the boss, he choses and I enjoy that choice.

Satisfied

Apparently about 50% of adults in the UK are unsatisfied with their sex lives, apparently also many people don’t have regular sex. The survey by Relate, puts this down people feeling that they need to perform well, that they need to have penetrative sex and that they need it to be spontaneous. Reading the comments after the article, this girl would say that those who are unhappy about their sex may well have more fundamental problems with their relationships. This girl has experience of being in the wrong relationship, one where she didn’t really find her husband attractive any more and one where sex of any kind was rare. Sex is not the only important thing in a relationship and it is fully possible to enjoy life without it. But when sex is good, then it really is integral to your wellbeing as a couple.

This girl probably has more sex now, at the age of 53 than ever before (yes this girl had a birthday this week). What is more, she is enjoying that sex in a way that she could previously only fantasise about. This girl has been considering some of the reasons for this.

First there is the power dynamic and the knowledge that Master is in control, that He calls the shots. That is not to say that this girl can’t and doesn’t initiate things. But it is satisfying to know that no one is going to suggest that you need to take more control of things and that if no sex occurs tonight it must be all your fault.

Second, that He not only owns this girl’s body, her holes and her orgasms but that he takes such pleasure in doing so. He loves to touch, stroke, to kiss. He makes her feel wanted and loved, makes her feel good about her own body since He seems to love it so much. He spends a lot of time touching that property, and making His slave aroused, taking pleasure and ultimately taking those orgasms. Sometimes that leads to penetrative sex, but often it doesn’t. Not because we don’t want to but more like because we don’t need to.

Thirdly there are other ways that we achieve sexual satisfaction. Through play, through the power exchange itself, through just talking about the things we have done and things we will do in the future, including fantasies we both have and know we will fulfil when the time is right. For Master sexual satisfaction comes through the knowledge that He calls the shots, and that in itself leads to the kind of sex we have had this morning. For this girl, satisfaction comes through the orgasms she has given, through the pain she currently feels in her used arse and through the saltiness she can still taste in her mouth from His gift to her.

Yes, it is safe to say that this girl is one very satisfied person.

Centred

Since getting back from holiday, life has been busy and stressful. Most of this stress has come from one particular place, or should I say person. I have never enjoyed the kind of relationship with my mum that either of us might have wanted. She always says it is because we are too similar, I sincerely hope that is not true since she is currently behaving very badly.

I know that the set back of the fractured hip was a big blow to her and has dented her confidence along with her hard fought for mobility. But it would be so nice if she could be at least pleasant about it. Instead me and my brothers are being made to feel less than useful. Despite spending so much of our time off from work running around doing things for her.

Things came to a head at the beginning of this week when the cleaner gave her the sack. No, she didn’t sack the cleaner, it happened the other way round. By text, to me. Apparently she is rude, inconsiderate and two faced. These accusations are pretty much true.  But I never thought that she was like that with someone who comes in for an hour or two once a week. It would be true to say that the fact she is the friend of my brother’s girl friend might have contributed, but I really didn’t need this kind of stress this week.

Friday is now my regular day off and they stretch ahead of me as a day when I have to help mum. I should be keen to help of course, I want to be and to a certain extent I am. But at the same time, I dread it. The harsh words, the way she is only interested in herself, and the way everything I and everyone else does is just not good enough. This week was no exception, and culminated in a number of short sharp phone messages because I had bought her the kind of fish that I should know that she hates!

A few times this last week I have been a bit on the bratty side with Master. That and I have challenged things He has said and done. This is something that He doesn’t like; particularly if like me the other person is hell bent on arguing the point for far too long.

So after a great day out on Saturday – a girlie lunch, a film and dinner with Master – I ended up passing much of the journey home fuming. I was both upset and angry and still believed I was right.

In bed, He held me and told me He was sorry and that He had noticed that I have been much more stressed lately. I said sorry too and all was well, we slept.

Sunday morning arrived and as we lay in bed together there was no sign of what was to come. He suddenly jumped out of bed and told His slave to get on all fours, then He piled up some pillows for her to lie on and secured her wrists in cuffs by her ankles. A mixture of pain and pleasure then ensued. The pleasure of the hitachi and the pain of various floggers, paddles and a cane. Every time the pain seemed to be getting a little much back came the hitachi and with it an orgasm was permitted.

He instructed this girl to get on top and to ride His cock. This is a favourite position for both of us. He likes to have access to His slave’s body and to control her movements from below. Next He took her arse. Boy did He take this girl in a way He really hasn’t for a long time.

For both of us this was as much about redefining the whole Master / slave relationship as anything. It was about His power and her submission. For the first time in months this girl found herself floating into His body. She felt her mind clearing and all thoughts of anyone and anything else leave her. She was His slave and He her Master. Lastly she was allowed to finish Him off with her mouth, a perfect ending for us both.

It is so easy in any relationship for life to just take over and for couples to forget the important things.  Thankfully Master recognised the signs and now His slave is centred again and remembers just who she is, what she is and indeed her place.

Of course, none of this makes me wrong, or Him right but sometimes a slave just needs to know when to shut her mouth and I definitely need practice at that!

Happy New Year

Since I wrote my last post about the amount of kinky sex Master and I had been having, we have been going through a leaner patch. Sadly, we have both had some kind of virus; sore throat, runny nose, cough, that kind of thing. Though we haven’t been properly ill. While Master and I have been lucky enough to be in each other’s company for 6 out of the past 7 nights, it wasn’t until this morning He was able to take His girl for the first time this year.

The return of Master’s mojo was announced this morning, when He placed my hand on His cock. He put his own over my pussy as we both stirred.  Within minutes, He was on top of me. forcing His way in, reclaiming His girl.

“Your’e feeling better Master” I suggested

“you want to bet?” came the response.

Having taken His cunt back, he reminded girl of her her slutty neediness, and told me to turn onto my side.

It has been quite a few weeks since Master has laid claim to my arse, indeed, I have ben pretty bad at keeping to the contractual agreement to wear one of my butt plugs twice a week in His absence (there, that is out in the open).

As He pushed His way in, even with lube, it wasn’t all together pleasant. I cheekily asked if He could be a little more gentle. He politely informed me He was taking what was His, though probably did ease up. Very quickly though, I felt my body relax and respond to His need. Probably helped by his fingers on both my pierced nipples and clit. Next I was allowed to cum for Him as I needed. Cum for Him I did, several times and as usual the whole thing is a kind of blur. A very good blur mind you.

He finished the whole session off with me being able to take my prize orally, along with Him wishing me happy new year.

Wow, it was worth waiting for!

Saturday morning fun

Master introduced two new toys shortly after we woke on Saturday morning. The first was some kind of oddly shaped gadget, apparently called (according to the website he obviously bought it from) an intimate part spreader. Also according to the website it stimulates the G spot. Well. It certainly stimulated the G spot. Plus seemed to cause this girl’s clit to go into some kind of spasm. That is some toy!!! It looks weird, but wow!! 


This girl was ready for anything. Just as well, since He then introduced something else. Something this girl can only describe as a snake. Well, kind of very very long, double ended cock. Master made His girl fuck herself silly with that cock. Apparently it is suitable to fit in two different holes, or two different girls. Obviously the opportunities are endless. 
By the time this girl had had her cunt spread, her labia exposed, her clit blown on and then a large snake fucking her, she was a gibbering wreck deep in a subby space. Her reward for giving Master the pleasure of watching His girl used in this way was to be able to take Him in her mouth and reap the benefits of His orgasm.
This girl loves to give and receive pleasure and that was some pleasure. This girl was fit to burst with her own happiness.
Unfortunately later, events out of her control sent her into a bit of a tail spin. Events which took her all of Sunday morning to recover from. 
This girl has spoken before of the problems associated with the whole polyamorous lifestyle. Once again it was that whole thing which stopped this girl feeling quite as good as she had done. At times it is hard to understand quite what this girl or indeed Master does to deserve such highs and then such lows. But it is as it is. Things are back on an even keel again now, but this girl has to wonder for how long. This girl often wonders how she might get through this whole thing. Whether it is worth it. On Saturday night and into Sunday, she had serious doubts.
But it isn’t often in life a girl gets the chance of the kind of happiness Master brings to her. The fun they have together, the way they are able to laugh through difficult situations. Life was never meant to be easy, and for sure it isn’t. The life this girl and her Master are living is complex and down right complicated. But from where this girl sits right now it is worth it. 
Anyway where else will she find a man who has such a wonderful range of gadgets and isn’t afraid to use them!