Butt plug

One of the first purchases I made when I started to explore BDSM was a butt plug. This was at the behest of S who in April 2012 I had just started a relationship with. On 29th April of that year I was preparing to visit him and wrote this:

Last night we discussed what i will wear when i visit him later this coming week. For obvious reasons it will not be practical to drive dressed as a maid at 7 in the morning. i guess in the evening you could easily be on the way to a fancy dress party but in the morning, well no. i have a very nice black and white skirt, recently purchased from M&S, which is knee length but which easily rides up when you are sitting. i will be wearing this with a new low cut white top. Underneath will be no underwear except for stockings and suspenders. The stockings will be fish net. i will be driving with my skirt around my waist and i will be wearing a butt plug. i will stop at a service area and use a dildo to make myself cum while talking to Sir on the phone. These are his instructions and I will comply with them.

My excitement at taking instructions and doing something so risqué was obvious. The relationship was just under a month old and I was embracing it with the enthusiasm of a teenager. On heat.

Anal sex was a large part of what we did together. It was a new experience and something I discovered I enjoyed. It felt forbidden and dangerous, but it was also a huge turn on.

Wearing a butt plug now

The first time my now Master and I played he inserted a plug into me as part of the events. A week or two later and he also had possessed me. Soon after he bought me a small n-joy butt plug, followed soon after by a much larger one. I wore them frequently when we lived apart.

Once the bulb of the plug has passed through the anal sphincter there is no pain. But it is something that you know is there, inside you. As you move around, so the pressure changes slightly. I find that I am almost constantly aroused. The presence of the plug inside me is something I can focus on if I want or need to. When stressed or upset for example. During the early days of our relationship, especially during difficult times with Master’s other slave, I used a butt plug to help focus me. Sometimes at Master’s request, but other times it was my decision. Its presence also helps achieve great organisms through clitical stimulation.

In recent times I have worn my butt plugs less frequently. As life became busy and I focused on other things. Perhaps because we were out so much at weekends. But now we are trying to refocus on anal sex and my wearing of the plug. The requirement is for me to wear it on Tuesdays and Thursdays. To be honest, I think I would be happy to try more days, since I am finding it a pleasant addition to my usual routine. It really is helping me to focus on the feelings it gives me. To think about my submission when I do other things. This morning we had anal sex for the first time in ages and I think this might become a more common occurrence.

Re-exploring anal sex

This week’s Erotic Journal Challenge is about exploration and experimentation. Rather than exploring a large and wide ranging topic, we have been asked to focus in on something small and specific. My topic is anal sex.

Why anal sex?

There was a time when we were enjoying lots of anal sex, but over time this has changed. It isn’t because we don’t like it, we do. But more that anal sex requires more time, both in preparation and execution. It can be more messy and it can be technically more challenging. So for those reasons we have stuck to oral and vaginal sex much more. But we are both very keen to rediscover our love of things anal.

What we will do over the next 30 days

I have two lovely butt plugs which are sitting in the cupboard, I’m not sure when they last came out. Let alone find their way inside me. So first thing has to be to start wearing them. Master has suggested twice a week on days beginning with T. He has bought some new lube, to try, something more specialist looking than the general stuff we buy.

We have been having lots more sex generally over the past few weeks and this feels like something we both want and need.

I’ll report back at the end of next month about how things have gone.

G is for……….

Glass dildo and Good girl. The photo below is of my bottom, into which Master has inserted a glass dildo. There is something lovely about that object as it is pushed into your body. It is cool, it is smooth, it is hard but not in the way plastic or rubber is hard. It is also pretty, though you can’t see it’s beauty from this photo. The shaft of the dildo has rings of pink, I think (I don’t have it here so I can’t check). As you can see it has a ring of glass at the end which makes it easy to hold for withdrawal. The morning of the glass dildo was a morning of orgasms and of double penetration. A lot of our sex and play takes place in the mornings, it is a time when we are emerging from sleep and are feeling pretty sexy. The play times are less frequent than the sexy times, and that makes them special. The glass dildo is pretty special too.

Until about 2 years ago, I hadn’t been called a girl, much less a good girl for a very long time. When Master told me I was girl, his girl, this girl I found it hard to get my head around. But since I am meant to refer to myself as this girl all of the time, and much of the time I remember to do so, the words now trip off of my tongue more easily.

I love nothing more these days than to be told I am a good girl, that I have done well and pleased him. Sometimes I do forget who I am, and I do say too much, I do buy into his argumentative nature, I do allow myself to get dragged in and to argue back, even when I know I will get annoyed and start to question my very place as his slave. This statement is written for and to Master, since this happened last night and last week and the week before. I say it because I know what is happening and I can stop it. I say it because I truly am his slave, his good girl and I am not going to allow discussions on topics we will never agree on and which aren’t even important to us, to get in the way of that.

What is His

Weeks and weeks go by in a blur. Work happens, we go out and about; concerts, theatre, films, meals. Then are the times we just chill out and do little. Sex is always part of those times as is the undercurrent of our M/s dynamic. Sometimes though a little more is needed. This week this girl must have known something, or perhaps gave off some specific vibes as she wore her but plug for 5 of the previous 7 nights. There is something very comforting about the feel of that metal inside. The weight of it, the coolness as you push it in, the sense of arousal that is ever present. Waking with it still inside, feeling the need to lie there for a few moments before the day starts imagining the metal being replaced with Master’s own hard organ.

It had been a while since this girl had taken seriously her responsibility to prepare herself in this way. It had also been a while since he had expressed the desire to use her arse. But this week she did and He let her know what was in His mind too.

He started, soon after waking, by stroking on of her pierced nipples, and then taking it into His mouth and stroking the other. Familiar feelings of arousal filled her groins, but she fought to keep them at bay. Until that was He signalled that He wanted her to orgasm, through a count down from 10. Then filled with endorphins she took His cock in her Mouth and concentrated on worshipping Him, while all the time she could hear Him talking about their roles and purpose as Master and slave. This girl’s purpose is to serve her Master and to be ready to be used by Him. That knowledge spurs her on through life, but it is easier to remember your place when you have a mouthful of cock. Pulling away, she spent a while stroking Him, but then He got out of bed and went into the playroom, returning with a glass dildo.

On all fours as instructed she felt the dildo’s coolness as it passed through her anal sphincter and slipped slowly in. As His cock brushed against her clit on its way into her cunt, she could tell just how wet she was. After a bit of repositioning to get the angles right, she could feel His cock deep inside. Her body felt like it was completely full. All the time He was asking questions about her place as His slave and in turn she responded, telling Him that He is her Master, owner of her body, mind and limits.

He withdrew and removed the dildo, then instructing her to lie flat on the bed, He pushed His cock into the place the dildo had been and took the arse that He owns for Himself. Deep inside her, she felt any resistance she may have had melt away. She felt His Dominance and she felt His ownership. She felt complete.

Afterwards as they lay together He finally touched the clit, rubbing her until the orgasm racked her body and she lay almost speechless. It had been a while since she last entered this special slave place, somewhere she will now likely stay for a while.

Tomorrow we are leaving for a few days in The Netherlands, so hopefully more chance for Master to take what is most certainly His.

That feeling

When you clench your butt cheeks and feel a discomfort around the anal area that reminds you that you that penetration recently occured.

That is the feeling that this girl has tonight.

Master may have mentioned yesterday that He desired to use her in this way. But this morning when we awoke there was no indication it would happen. The way He took possession of this girl’s cunt might have given a clue. Plus the fact that He told her that she was His cunt and that she readily agreed and called herself His cunt might have helped.

He had her turn on her side and slid slowly into that forbidden place.

But then He suggested that she might get onto and try sliding Him into her from above.

This girl wasn’t sure it would happen, but sitting on His hard cock, suddenly she felt it slide into her.

The rest, well is a blur of discomfort followed by pleasure of the feelings experienced by us both. Of orgasm, granted to her, by Him. This girl became Master’s arse cunt, for His pleasure. But as always His pleasure is hers.

This weekend was a wonderful break, in a hotel, just a few miles from home.

Blogging momentum has returned.

Do you know what? This girl has ‘that’ feeling again!

Masturbation (and sex) on Monday

Masturbation Monday is a year old today. Congratulations to Kayla Lords for coming up with the idea. In celebration here is this girl’s contribution.

It’s a bank holiday here in the UK. Wonderful, time to relax and enjoy the end of summer, lovely sunny days soon to end. For us, here in the UK it seems that summer is already ended and this morning when Master and girl woke it was dull, cool and rainy out. But every rain cloud has a silver lining, as a holiday means no work for this girl and so the chance to drift back to sleep. At some point, reasonably early in the morning, Master began to stroke his girl between her legs. “You like this don’t you slut?” He asked. Of course she likes it, who wouldn’t. The girl lay back and enjoyed the feelings wash over her, allowed herself to relax into His touch and arousal to sweep around her body. She knew her clitoris was enlarging as it became engorged and that she was becoming wet to His touch. The idea of cumming didn’t occur to her and He didn’t suggest she could or should. Instead they both drifted back to sleep. The girl was pretty sure that without Master’s touch that  might not have happened.

The next time we woke, the phone was ringing. It was around 10.30am and it was this girl’s mum. Luckily the girl came to her senses pretty quickly and any way she mostly only had to listen to the updates of mum’s weekend – the films she has watched, the food she has eaten, that kind of exiting stuff. Finishing the call though, she looked across to Master who was busy looking at porn on His phone, while quietly masturbating Himself. A few minutes later and this girl looked at Master – He was now making the bed shake – He informed her that he was getting Himself hard enough to fuck her arse. 
Still horny from the earlier masturbation, this girl shivered with anticipation. “Roll over girl” He commanded and soon after His now very hard cock was taking possession of what it rightfully His. This girl felt herself getting lightheaded as He pounded inside her. She found herself unable to stop herself pressing back towards Him rhythmically as He took a break. He squeezed her nipple, playing with the piercing as He loves to do. Those piercings which were done for Him. The nipples that belong to Him. Master and this girl felt the power in His touches which brought this girl to orgasm. 
A little later, this girl was given her prize. One that Master allowed her to swallow. 
She lay back in His arms, snuggling to him for warmth on this cool end of August morning. He asked her how she was feeling. “light headed and slave like” was her response.
“I like it when my slave is light headed because of me” For Him it is all about the power and the control. For this girl it is too.

Satisfied

Apparently about 50% of adults in the UK are unsatisfied with their sex lives, apparently also many people don’t have regular sex. The survey by Relate, puts this down people feeling that they need to perform well, that they need to have penetrative sex and that they need it to be spontaneous. Reading the comments after the article, this girl would say that those who are unhappy about their sex may well have more fundamental problems with their relationships. This girl has experience of being in the wrong relationship, one where she didn’t really find her husband attractive any more and one where sex of any kind was rare. Sex is not the only important thing in a relationship and it is fully possible to enjoy life without it. But when sex is good, then it really is integral to your wellbeing as a couple.

This girl probably has more sex now, at the age of 53 than ever before (yes this girl had a birthday this week). What is more, she is enjoying that sex in a way that she could previously only fantasise about. This girl has been considering some of the reasons for this.

First there is the power dynamic and the knowledge that Master is in control, that He calls the shots. That is not to say that this girl can’t and doesn’t initiate things. But it is satisfying to know that no one is going to suggest that you need to take more control of things and that if no sex occurs tonight it must be all your fault.

Second, that He not only owns this girl’s body, her holes and her orgasms but that he takes such pleasure in doing so. He loves to touch, stroke, to kiss. He makes her feel wanted and loved, makes her feel good about her own body since He seems to love it so much. He spends a lot of time touching that property, and making His slave aroused, taking pleasure and ultimately taking those orgasms. Sometimes that leads to penetrative sex, but often it doesn’t. Not because we don’t want to but more like because we don’t need to.

Thirdly there are other ways that we achieve sexual satisfaction. Through play, through the power exchange itself, through just talking about the things we have done and things we will do in the future, including fantasies we both have and know we will fulfil when the time is right. For Master sexual satisfaction comes through the knowledge that He calls the shots, and that in itself leads to the kind of sex we have had this morning. For this girl, satisfaction comes through the orgasms she has given, through the pain she currently feels in her used arse and through the saltiness she can still taste in her mouth from His gift to her.

Yes, it is safe to say that this girl is one very satisfied person.

Centred

Since getting back from holiday, life has been busy and stressful. Most of this stress has come from one particular place, or should I say person. I have never enjoyed the kind of relationship with my mum that either of us might have wanted. She always says it is because we are too similar, I sincerely hope that is not true since she is currently behaving very badly.

I know that the set back of the fractured hip was a big blow to her and has dented her confidence along with her hard fought for mobility. But it would be so nice if she could be at least pleasant about it. Instead me and my brothers are being made to feel less than useful. Despite spending so much of our time off from work running around doing things for her.

Things came to a head at the beginning of this week when the cleaner gave her the sack. No, she didn’t sack the cleaner, it happened the other way round. By text, to me. Apparently she is rude, inconsiderate and two faced. These accusations are pretty much true.  But I never thought that she was like that with someone who comes in for an hour or two once a week. It would be true to say that the fact she is the friend of my brother’s girl friend might have contributed, but I really didn’t need this kind of stress this week.

Friday is now my regular day off and they stretch ahead of me as a day when I have to help mum. I should be keen to help of course, I want to be and to a certain extent I am. But at the same time, I dread it. The harsh words, the way she is only interested in herself, and the way everything I and everyone else does is just not good enough. This week was no exception, and culminated in a number of short sharp phone messages because I had bought her the kind of fish that I should know that she hates!

A few times this last week I have been a bit on the bratty side with Master. That and I have challenged things He has said and done. This is something that He doesn’t like; particularly if like me the other person is hell bent on arguing the point for far too long.

So after a great day out on Saturday – a girlie lunch, a film and dinner with Master – I ended up passing much of the journey home fuming. I was both upset and angry and still believed I was right.

In bed, He held me and told me He was sorry and that He had noticed that I have been much more stressed lately. I said sorry too and all was well, we slept.

Sunday morning arrived and as we lay in bed together there was no sign of what was to come. He suddenly jumped out of bed and told His slave to get on all fours, then He piled up some pillows for her to lie on and secured her wrists in cuffs by her ankles. A mixture of pain and pleasure then ensued. The pleasure of the hitachi and the pain of various floggers, paddles and a cane. Every time the pain seemed to be getting a little much back came the hitachi and with it an orgasm was permitted.

He instructed this girl to get on top and to ride His cock. This is a favourite position for both of us. He likes to have access to His slave’s body and to control her movements from below. Next He took her arse. Boy did He take this girl in a way He really hasn’t for a long time.

For both of us this was as much about redefining the whole Master / slave relationship as anything. It was about His power and her submission. For the first time in months this girl found herself floating into His body. She felt her mind clearing and all thoughts of anyone and anything else leave her. She was His slave and He her Master. Lastly she was allowed to finish Him off with her mouth, a perfect ending for us both.

It is so easy in any relationship for life to just take over and for couples to forget the important things.  Thankfully Master recognised the signs and now His slave is centred again and remembers just who she is, what she is and indeed her place.

Of course, none of this makes me wrong, or Him right but sometimes a slave just needs to know when to shut her mouth and I definitely need practice at that!

Happy New Year

Since I wrote my last post about the amount of kinky sex Master and I had been having, we have been going through a leaner patch. Sadly, we have both had some kind of virus; sore throat, runny nose, cough, that kind of thing. Though we haven’t been properly ill. While Master and I have been lucky enough to be in each other’s company for 6 out of the past 7 nights, it wasn’t until this morning He was able to take His girl for the first time this year.

The return of Master’s mojo was announced this morning, when He placed my hand on His cock. He put his own over my pussy as we both stirred.  Within minutes, He was on top of me. forcing His way in, reclaiming His girl.

“Your’e feeling better Master” I suggested

“you want to bet?” came the response.

Having taken His cunt back, he reminded girl of her her slutty neediness, and told me to turn onto my side.

It has been quite a few weeks since Master has laid claim to my arse, indeed, I have ben pretty bad at keeping to the contractual agreement to wear one of my butt plugs twice a week in His absence (there, that is out in the open).

As He pushed His way in, even with lube, it wasn’t all together pleasant. I cheekily asked if He could be a little more gentle. He politely informed me He was taking what was His, though probably did ease up. Very quickly though, I felt my body relax and respond to His need. Probably helped by his fingers on both my pierced nipples and clit. Next I was allowed to cum for Him as I needed. Cum for Him I did, several times and as usual the whole thing is a kind of blur. A very good blur mind you.

He finished the whole session off with me being able to take my prize orally, along with Him wishing me happy new year.

Wow, it was worth waiting for!