I have to admit to being quite pleased with the way that my body shape is beginning to change. Also that I can now wear some of my smaller panties. Like this leopard print style ones. This serves as a useful reminder before I completely throw my lifestyle changes out of the window.
This last week has been a weird one. We were lucky to have spent the weekend in London, despite the cancellation of Eroticon. Now that everything is closing down, I am so glad we did. Trouble is, I’ve kind of continued the weekend all week and so have been worried I’m going to get a weight gain. But when I hopped on the scales I found it is minimal and can be reversed by a couple of stricter days. This image also shows me how I am shaping up and why I don’t want to let it go.
I am very curvy. I have curves in places I like, but also in places I don’t. For years I hated the sight of my body and would only look at it in a mirror that I found flattering. I also avoided the camera. This was helped along by the fact I always seemed to be the one behind the camera. Whole holidays passed with 60 photos of my son, a few of my husband and lots of the scenery. There’d be an occasional one of me, but if I felt I looked too fat, I’d hide it away or throw it out. We’re mainly talking pre-digital here, because those just never saw the light of day.
But things have changed. While I am still not sharing photos of myself in a swimsuit with family and friends I have no problem with showing my curves here on my blog. So, what has changed?
Writing about sex and kink
To begin with my posts were pretty much just words, though one of my first ever posts did contain a photo of me in a maid’s outfit. Gradually I introduced images, mainly those I found on Tumblr. But then I met Master and he took photos of me, some of which I liked more than others. S also took a few and they too appeared here, but there aren’t many. Now, I like to use a photo of or by me to illustrate my blog where possible.
I’ve definitely grown to like and love my curves more since I’ve been with Master. Partly because of his body positivity. He always tells me he loves my curves, loves to feel them, see them and photograph them. He loves the way I look in leather and other fetish gear. Admires my nipple piercing jewellery and me generally naked. In fact that’s the thing that set’s him apart from the other men I’ve had in my life. That he likes me naked. I’m not always so thrilled with the finished product. So, I’ll try and crop out what I think is the worst of my lumps and bumps.
Post mastectomy was a difficult time. But at the moment I feel happier posting a photo of my chest on my blog than going round without a bra. Go figure that one out!
There are few places that it’s ok to show photos of a naked body. It’s ok to show a man’s naked chest on Instagram, Facebook or Tumblr but not a woman’s. A self hosted blog and twitter for the moment are ok. But who knows when this creeping censorship will creep up on us further.
Sinful Sunday and February Photofest
It was really joining in with these two meme’s created and run by Molly Moore that sealed my place as a shower of my own curves. I’ve just completed my fourth February Photofest and am proud that I posted every day. Most of the images were of me. They ranged across the history of our relationship and if you look you’ll see that sometimes I have more curves than others. At the moment I’m proud to be shrinking down a little and that makes me happy.
As for Sinful Sunday. Often I’ll only post once or twice a week when I am busy or away travelling and one of those will usually be a Sinful Sunday. Our images aren’t always as creative as others but we try to make some effort.
When I look back over the almost 8 years of this blog I am amazed to see how far I’ve come. Not just in the quality and quantity of my writing but also in what I’m prepared to share of myself and our relationship. I can’t see that changing any time soon. I’m 57, I have had a mastectomy and I am a big curvy woman. And, I’m proud to share myself with anyone who would like to see me.
I’m out of new and original photos for February Photofest. So, some effort will be required to generate the 6 photos needed to make it to the finish line. Make that 5, because I snapped this image of myself enjoying my lazy Sunday morning in bed.
This week I’m sharing some of my favourite photos from this month’s February Photofest. I am in total awe of the amount of work that fellow bloggers put into this annual event. Which I’m sure you know is run by the fabulous Molly Moore. Every year I say I’m going to plan and to create great images and every year I struggle to make it to the end. Below are some of my favourites so far, this year.
The beautiful fishnet body stocking Little Switch Bitch is wearing in this image is inspiring. I’d love to wear something similar and to carry it off as well as she does. But I also love the colour contrast of her skin, the outfit and the grass. I do love outdoor photos and need to take more of them myself.
In this image by Purple’s Gem the flowers from the garden are inside and resting delicately on little gem’s beautiful body. Their creativity knows no bounds and I have enjoyed looking at all of their photos. This is a favourite because of the colour contrasts again. I’m a sucker for those!
My favourite photo on my own blog this February is the one I took the other day for the Fishnet Wicked Wednesday prompt. I have to admit it is images such as this one by Nikki from Love is a Fetish. What beautiful tights that show off her very lovely ass.
Deviant Succubus’s photos this month have been a real joy. Her images are such fun and a great opportunity to see her in so many poses and situations. This one is both beautiful and so funny. I love it!
I am enjoying The other Livvy’s Film Review Blog and this month some of her February photofest photos reflect the films she is reviewing . This one from The Graduate is fabulous. It’s great that EA is such a sport when it comes to his role in the photos. In this one he is wearing clothes, which isn’t always the case in their photos.
Marie’s image of herself superimposed over her local city of Rotterdam is both clever and beautiful. I have great memories of our visit there last year when we met and had dinner with Marie and Master T. Unfortunately we didn’t get to see much of the city due to the weather when we arrived. But that’s a great excuse to return.
Brigit Delaney’s theme has been close-ups. This beautiful photo appeared last weekend for Sinful Sunday. A perfect close up of Mr D’s cock. Just lovely.
For obvious reasons I love a kneeling submissive photo. I love the anticipation that shines through this image from Jade from Pieces of Jade. Plus the casualness of her partner as he holds his drink. It makes me want to strip off and get on the floor at Master’s feet.
Finally a Sinful Sunday image from submissy, taken on the occasion of her 50th birthday recently. A stunning image of a beautiful person. I just had to share it here.
They were looking a little lonely. Those first, early daffodils now trying to bloom in our garden. So, I decided to keep them company for a little while. It was late in the afternoon of a sunny, winter’s day. So the yellow flowers were looking downwards. But I think you’ll agree these early daffodils are a sight that tells you that spring isn’t too far away.
This would have been a great image for this objectification post from last week. But I wanted to save it for February Photofest. I’m not really sure why this hasn’t been featured before, but really happy to include it now. This was also taken at the secret Dungeon
As you can see my nipples are clamped, plus there is the hood and lead. I was definitely Master’s plaything that night!
“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.”
This is prompt week on Sinful Sunday. But as I mentioned in my last post, I am not a lover of Halloween, therefore I make no excuse for not following the prompt.
Instead I want to show you another (in what might be a series) of photos where I proudly show you my body. I am preparing for my reconstructive surgery and as I do so feel better about sharing what my mastectomy looks like.
This is the third (and final) photo from our recent trip to Oxford. I think you can see here that I am much more at home in my body. More positive and confident. This has been a journey I don’t recommend, but one which I am happy to share.
Hotel rooms offer up infinite opportunities for Sinful Sunday photos and we are lucky we travel often. This was taken in the same room as last week’s image, but as you can see the view is very different. Some of you may even recognise the location.