What you see is what you get

This week, Food For Thought Friday has asked about anonymity online;  to what extent do we hide (or indeed show) who we really are.

As those who know me in real life, or have met me at some event will know, I am reasonably open and out there. The person I write about is completely me, since fiction is not really my bag. Stories are often based on me, or my fantasies. Which is probably why they lack excitement and drama.

Julie really is my name, though MPB isn’t. Well it is to one person and he doesn’t need to read anything to know who I am. I wasn’t creative enough to develop my own clever pseudonym and anyway wasn’t all that troubled about people knowing my name is Julie. Of course there are a lot of people, mainly of a similar age with my name and so I can remain relatively anonymous. If you knew my surname, that would be different, I am the only one of me on Facebook and I have never met another. There is no need for anyone on my blog or Twitter to know my surname, unless I am buying something from them.  For the Smut Marathon I gave myself the name Jones, which goes reasonably well with Julie.

As I grow older, and as my career comes to something of a close, I am less worried about discovery as a sex and kink blogger. No one is going to sack me now. However I do have people to protect, those who wouldn’t want to know and definitely wouldn’t understand. So, best I retain that final bit of anonymity. After all, it will also serve as protection to me, from myself.

One of the questions asked as part of this was: is your anonymous/pseudonymous online self a secret or more a form of protective “camouflage”?

The answer is probably the latter.  I show much of myself on my blog (in words and pictures) and am open about who I am to those who meet me. But still I wish to retain something of a screen. Yes camouflage.

What I know now

It is the 50th Food 4 Thought Friday, which is a major accomplishment. I am in awe of all within this blogging community that run memes. There is an extraordinary amount of work. So well done and thank you. Having said that, I usually struggle to participate in everything. But since I am trying to post every day in June, and I am on holiday, with wifi, here goes.

What I know now

What one part of your sex life today would most surprise the 18 year old you?

Probably that at the age of 55 I have sex at all. I was so naive back then and uneducated about sex. I never envisaged people as old as I am now even had sex.

What one thing might shock that younger you?

The extent to which I enjoy sex. That being with the right partner is the key to enjoyment and that we are meant to enjoy sex (not sure if that is one answer or 3).

Is there anything in the younger you’s sexual ambitions or fantasies you have not yet fulfilled?

I have probably surpassed them. Having bought the Joy of Sex shortly after my marriage when I was about 22, we spent some time trying out various sexual positions.  I wish I still had a copy to check out if I have had sex in all of them. It felt slightly naughty and a bit hippy at the time. I’m not sure if anal was even in there, but if it was then I’ve done that too.

What part of the younger you’s sex life do you look back on with the most nostalgia?

Probably the ability to work all day, party all evening and still have sex at the end of the night. Because we had so much energy then. I have a hunch that Master and I would have been proper party animals if we had known each other. Because as I said at the beginning, compatibility is the key.

Sexting

 


The Food For Thought Friday prompt on sexting throws up so many memories for me. Even before I knew I was interested in sex blogging, or indeed in having an active kinky sex life I was already sexting. Looking back, on my marriage there were key points when I looked for excitement. I just didn’t know what I was looking for.

The early days – pre sexting

There was a time when there were no mobile phones, and few home computers. Even once most of us had a phone we used it for calls. Texts were expensive and you only called people you knew. Plus you tended to turn the thing off when not in use.

In around 1998 or so we bought our first computer. We put it in the dining room and my son played games there. After he was in bed, I played the games too. I remember staying up to 2am one weekend night, much to my husband’s disgust, building a theme park. Later I learned (probably through my son) that you could engage with other gamers. Plus, I built a website based on the Dragon Ball Z cartoons. I was self taught and proud of myself. Next I found themed chatrooms. Somehow I found myself chatting in real time to people around the world.

Chatting and Sexting

It all started very innocuously, around the millennium. I had a thing for men in glasses and joined a chat room with that theme. There were plenty of weird people, but also some very interesting and sane individuals. I spent hours talking about anything and everything with people I felt I was starting to know, until one day I encountered someone who sparked something in me. Private chat had come into play, he was in the midst of a marriage break up and I pretty miserable in mine. The chat became a little more raunchy and before I knew it we were typing suggestive and sexual words and sentences to each other. Looking back, I am sure he was a seasoned professional, but for me this was new. Still sitting at our desktop computer, by now in the hall I entered a world from which I have probably never emerged.

Phone sexting – Text, calls and photos

Looking back, my initial foray into the sexting world was pretty tame. It wasn’t until I had a laptop with broadband that I explored actual sex related chat rooms. Sending photos took hours, even with broadband so, given the opportunity, once you had texted the next step was phone sex. Later, broadband improved and photos were possible. But sexting as we now know it didn’t become possible until our phones were enabled with 3 and then 4g.

It is really only through this quick look back at my sexting history that I can actually recognise the frustrations I felt. Here I was, a wife and mother chatting to strangers online. My husband wasn’t happy, mainly because I wasn’t paying him attention. He though was often watching TV or asleep of an evening. Things only went awry really when one or two men I chatted to sent me pictures and I, stupidly didn’t delete them as I should have. I am not sure I ever wanted what they sent, but felt excited that they did.

The world of dial up, early broadband and mobiles of the time was innocent in comparison to what we have now. But it opened up a world I didn’t know existed and in a way led me to where I am today. Sexting was the start.

Better to give or to receive?

 

I was pleased, late last week, to see that Food for Thought Friday is back. I only found the meme just as it stopped a couple of years ago, so joined in only twice. But, now it is back – with a Friday prompt – and almost a whole week to write something. Luckily for me, since I was busy last weekend.

Receiving

Master loves to both give and receive. I am almost inclined to think that he prefers giving. He certainly loves to spend prolonged amounts of time with his head buried in my pussy. Before I met him, my experience of cunnilingus was limited. Certainly my ex was no expert and anyway he preferred sex be about him. To be frank, he rarely engaged in any kind of foreplay. So the likelihood of him going down on me was slim. Master is different, he enjoys the feel and taste of me. Plus there is always my piercing to play with.

I like to suck him while he is down on me, but concentrating can be a problem. Master is busy nibbling, sucking and licking me to orgasm and I am struggling to work out how to suck. Instead I often stroke him – his cock, his balls and his anus. Moving onto his hips and back, I take pleasure in using my hands on him. While he uses his mouth on me.

Giving

If I am giving oral to Master, I am often found on my knees. Providing worship to his cock. Indeed, he has a very worshipful, thick and long cock. By far his is the favourite of any cock I have had the pleasure of licking, sucking or just holding in my mouth. He tends to know what he wants and gives instructions. He knows that the act of taking his cock in my mouth is enough to turn me on.

I have to admit that I am not a great fan of tasting my own juices, but I do like his. Particularly if he has eaten or drunk something quite sweet. It’s amazing how the taste of a man’s cum changes depending the previous days  dinner.

What is more, I like the smell and the taste of him in general. I am particularly fond of a newly bathed or showered penis. Though not adverse to one that is newly emerged from slumber.

It would be true to say, I am fond of both receiving and giving. But given that I am a slave and a slut, that is probably no surprise.