Blogging A-Z 2018: K&L

Kink and Limits

There is a place on Fetlife where you can list your kinks or as described there, fetishes. Those available range across the spectrum of those related to domination and submission, through pain, degradation, humiliation and so on. Just reading through posts there, blogs, books and comments on social media it’s possible to find out about those kinks and how people fulfil them.

What is clear, is that everyone is different. What works for one person, couple or group really doesn’t for others. But just because you come across something you wouldn’t want to do yourself, doesn’t make them wrong. Nor does it mean you have to want to try everything, after all everyone has limits.

My approach all along this journey has been that I have a few very hard limits when it comes to kink. Thankfully most of those are the same as Master, which makes life easy. These include blood, scat and anything completely illegal. I have one that I described to him at the beginning of our relationship that he has respected. It might seem odd, but I will not dress up in any nurse / medial related out fit. I am a nurse and as such will not bring my own profession into disrepute by degrading the uniform. I have no problem with others dressing as a sexy nurse, I am just not doing it.

All other limits I might have, or have had in the past are soft. This made it easy to give up decisions about those limits to Master once we agreed our power exchange relationship. He has a number of kinks that aren’t necessarily mine, but I am happy to embrace them. One of those would be water sports. Given a choice I wouldn’t initiate peeing on him or being peed on, but have to admit I don’t dislike it.

My journey to submission, slavery and kink has been one of great learning. We have explored our fantasies as well as things we knew we enjoyed. There have been things we have done once or twice and not repeated, and there are others we rarely do but would like more time to explore.

The fun and enjoyment we have together in the bedroom or play room are part of what makes our relationship special. It stops life getting dull and helps us learn more about each other along the way. I am glad I found kink and explored my limits and that I have him to help me do so.

\

Blogging A-Z 2018: H

This is the third year that I have participated in Blogging A-Z. This year i am going to try to make my topics a little more mainstream. They will, however clearly link to kink and may on occasion be NSFW.

H is for His

He cals her girl. This girl; His girl
He is her Master, her Lord and she His slave
She is His slut, His cum puppy. He controls her orgasms, they belong to Him; His.

He is her owner and she His property
People may find this difficult to understand but for her this is fact. She is His to love, to hold and to control.

Her body is pierced for His pleasure; nipples and clitoris. Her pleasure is His to have, to hold and to control.
She wears a collar, His collar. This is a sign of her slavery of His ownership, that she is His property.

She is His Bitch, Master’s Pleasing Bitch

 

 

A new day, a new year

Today is my birthday, and as I enter a new year of life I somehow find myself ready to blog again. The past couple of months have been somewhat quiet here. Save the occasional, writers block post Sinful Sunday has been my only regular offering.Last week’s Sinful Sunday post, a spur of the moment shot of Master changing a lightbulb naked  was rated in the top 5 by Molly. It is those kind of shots that really are the best. Therefore this week, since I have taken no photo involving stairs (this week’s prompt) I am taking a rest.Instead I am happy to report that our sex and M/s life is resurrecting itself. Or rather, perhaps we are finding the time to get it going again. Since holiday we have been busy. Weekends away, stuff to do around the house and garden. Plus we both seemed to have returned from holiday with a strange malaise that wouldn’t seem to shift. Master has a painful shoulder, which I hope he will seek medical help for soon. This weekend though, we have shoved all of that aside.

Two mornings in a row we have had sex. Raw, just woke up and wanted to grope and kiss each other sex. Yesterday, my eyes were barely open before I found myself on my knees before him, sucking his cock. This morning I was awake first, reading birthday messages on Facebook when He began to finger my clitoris. Then he went down on me, orgasms flew through me in a way that I haven’t experienced in months. Mindful of his shoulder pain I have been on top more than of late. I had almost forgotten how wonderful that feeling is, his control from beneath me is something to behold.

As recently as Friday I was wondering if I was still his submissive bitch. Something in the things I said, and my body language that night seem to have seemed through. To us both. We have reminded ourselves of who we are to each other and that feels really good.

Sinful Sunday will resume here next week, meantime if you read this please do click on the lips and see the great photos everyone has contributed this week. But for me, today I will enjoy my birthday and savour the thoughts of yesterday, this morning and all the days to come.

slave stuff

There was a time when pretty much all posts on this blog were written in the third person. Each sentence that might have used the pronoun ‘I’ began instead with ‘this girl’ or ‘she’. This blog was about a personal journey, about being trained and about learning how to please and serve Master. Somewhere along the line, that part has been lost from this place.Never writing in the first person became challenging. There were occasions that I seemed more appropriate and gradually I replaced she. This girl, the slave was lost from the conversation.

But perhaps it is time to bring her back. Perhaps she needs that aspect of her life to get back to the slave she wants and needs to be. There is, deep within this slave a yearning to reclaim the structure and the rules. To focus back on what was agreed at the beginning of our relationship and part of that is acknowledging that this slave has no specific name. That she should refer to herself not as I but to recognise her status as an object or possession.

This girl

He always refers to her as girl. She is without a name, she is His slave. She is good at complying with the requirement to refer to herself in this way during sex or a scene. Less so at other times. The blasé way in which this girl approaches her slavery has led to other lapses in behaviour and often in forgetting her place and role.

These include wearing underwear (it is often cold and anyway the middle-aged body needs support), not wearing the butt plug, not asking if clothing is required. This list could go on.

But there is no chance that this girl has completely forgotten that she is His slave.

Being His slave always

He is Master. She rarely thinks or refers to him as anything else. This girl thinks about Him constantly and does consider whether the actions she takes are something he would be happy with. This happens most often at work, a place where he is never with her. She often takes time to reflect and wonder what he would say if He had been present.

There are times each day when she touches the tangible symbols of slavery. The collar, the nipple jewellery and sometimes even the clitoral hood piercing. They serve as a constant physical reminder a way of grounding one’s self.

When Master and slave are out together there are rules that are always followed. He keeps control of any tickets or passes. He takes total control in restaurants, though there is often discussion about choices. Plus at any time there is ambiguity, or the potential for disagreement it is His word that is final.

Master is Master and slave is the slave. But this slave feels that now is the time to back to basics. Back to what was agreed at the beginning and back to blogging for its original purpose.

Going forward there will be more posts where the pronoun ‘I’ is not used.

2 Responses to slave stuff

  1. Slut says:

    This is a beautiful post that brought goosebumps to the skin of THIS slave. You are such an inspiration.

  2. Julie says:

    Thank you so much. This something that has been in the thoughts of this slave for a while. It has been too easy to drift along.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Blogging A-Z Challenge: M

There are times when I feel that our relationship together is just the same as everyone else’s. We have our ups and downs, we bicker and argue. But there are times when we need to make up, make love have a kind of loving sex and apologise for things that were said. We are good friends, we laugh and we play. We travel to lots of interesting places and spend as much time as we can together.

This is a different relationship to the one I had before. The power dynamic for one thing. The control he exerts over me only become apparent when there is a disagreement of if I need to defer to him. During our weekdays apart it is difficult to recognise his influence as I go about my working day. His influence over my actions is implicit rather than explicit, unnoticeable to others. But at the weekends and when we are on holiday together the dynamic changes and I find myself deferring to his decision-making more and more.

Our relationship is not one where he micromanages me. I don’t ask to spend money, since it is mine to spend. But I do ask what he thinks we should do, where we should go, what we should eat. I rarely take a decision these days without some level of consultation.

Sometimes my position as slave means that I do something I would rather not. This morning I was a little hung over; a little too much local wine passed my lips last night. While I showered and dressed he was reading my blog and getting aroused by my words and the picture. So he demanded I kneel before him, suck him off and provide relief. In my past life, I would have turned him down, but since I am the slave I now on I sank down to my knees. I knelt on the cushion he so helpfully provided and took my prize.

I am the slave, he is the Master.

The Collar

The collar is the symbol of who I am and to Master’s ownership of me. In the 18 months or so since He placed it around my neck, I have rarely removed it. At the beginning I used to do so to fly, since I was nervous of the whole airport security thing. But I have discovered that titanium does not set off airport security and if that is the case then the airport people are not bothered. Once or twice I have received a knowing smile but in the main nothing. At work very few people ever mentioned it, other than to admire it. My hairdresser loves it and would like one for herself. If people do mention it then they call it a necklace or tort.

I have come to realise that often people don’t really notice things about people, what they wear, how healthy they look, in the main they are wrapped up in themselves. It’s interesting that many people on fetlife worry about what people will think and say about them wearing this kind of symbol. Perhaps if Master had insisted I wear a dog collar 24/7 I might not feel the same, but since he hasn’t  and I love what he gave me I am proud to wear it.

 

365 Questions – Day 37; Torture

If you could do today over, would you change anything? 

 
Maybe I wouldn’t wake up at 4am having a night sweat – the misery of the menopause – then I wouldn’t have struggled to get out of bed this morning. On the other hand, maybe I would change the day from one that I had to work, to one where I was tortured like this………
 
 
 
 

Happy Anniversary

My 54+ years have contained highs and lows. In the main, the highs win over the lows. I am a half full rather than half empty person. I enjoyed a happy childhood with loving parents who tried to give us all that they could and two great but highly irritating brothers. Generally they hardly knew when they were well off – a sister who looked after them, ate their food to allow them to get down from the table, wrote their thank you cards post Christmas, told mum when they had hit her…….well maybe not that, but anyway.

My marriage was mainly positive despite his unfaithfulness, general inability to provide for his family and to make decisions. Plus the fact he was entirely absent during the first 3 years of my sons life. I guess that being a mother has been the main part of my life, before I met Master, when I have felt fulfilment. I make no excuse for saying that my greatest achievement in many ways has been producing and bringing up my son. He made me laugh when I was sad, he made me cry for mainly good and proud reasons. I am beyond proud of the young man he is now.
But when it comes to love and personal happiness the past three years top everything.
On 1st February 2014 I met the man who is now my Master. We had only been chatting online for a week but something about our interactions (plus the fact that we lived within 45 minutes of each other) made us decide to meet up.
The rest is history.
There is a lot I could write here, but much of this blog details our journey, the highs and the lows, not that there are many lows even if you were a half empty person which Master is and I am not.
Today, day 1 of February Photofest 2017, I am posting a photo that Master took of me waiting, ready for his use. Something that demonstrates the highlight of the life I now live as Master’s owned slave.
                  

 

Anticipating the year to come

Just over a week into the new year, and our holiday to Belgium behind us I am now thinking about the year ahead. While I am not necessarily a person who wholly believes in things like numerology, horoscopes or other things psychic,  I do kind of want to believe the idea that 2016 was the year of endings and 2017 about a new start.

It is coming up to 5 years since I began my original journey, over 4 since my ex discovered that I was not the happy bunny he thought I was and almost 3 since I met Master. I think the length of time that has elapsed is enough to know that the procrastination needs to stop and I really do need to get on with life.
Increasingly I feel sad when Master and I have been together for a prolonged period and then have to separate and go to our own homes. This week is no exception. I want to be with him, and need to get on with making that happen. During the second half of last year we completed quite a lot of work in my house and garden, all in preparation of my selling the house. There is now very little to do before the house can go on the market. I anticipate that the process will not be without its stresses, and don’t under estimate the sadness I will feel when I leave. My house is less cluttered that Master’s place. He is working on making it less so, but there is a way to go. Then there is the fact that the house will be his and not mine, though of course there is no reason that it won’t become home to me, but it will take time.
BUT.
Living together will mean that we can get on with living our life together in the way we wish. That our Master / slave dynamic can become a greater element of our lifestyle. It will mean that I can express my submission more overtly and he can do the same with his Dominance. Master has bought me many erotic items of clothing that I get little opportunity to wear because of our current living arrangements.
We will be able to have more sex. As we get older, we need more time for sex, our libido in general has dropped. While the idea is often great our bodies sometimes take longer to respond. Don’t get me wrong we pretty frequent, kinky and very enjoyable sex, but we are definitely restricted by not being together every night.
There is an economic perspective to this too. Living costs for 2 people are much less than double that of 1. That means we can visit more places, do more things and generally enjoy life.
Finally we will be happier together than we are apart and happiness, contentment and a feeling of well being is much healthier. If I think back 5 years I don’t think I even knew how unhappy I was, much less how content I could be.
Just before Christmas, Master and I went to a drinks party at the house of one of his neighbours. He made a comment that when he sees Master on his way into town he often has a smile on his face and appears happy. That, he said, wasn’t always the case.
I anticipate a great year ahead. I think we both do.
Social Media Auto Publish Powered By : XYZScripts.com