Pegs – not just for clothes

The current Kink of the Week is pegs or clothes pins as they are called in some places. Now, the application of pegs to my body was the first form of pain I inflicted on myself at the hands of another. As I describe in this post, S instructed me to apply pegs to my nipples while we spoke on the phone. It was mainly a long distance relationship and he wanted to exert his control over me. So, many times he instructed me to do things to my body while he listened (and later watched). This was my first introduction to Dominance and submission, and I was surprised at how readily I wanted to comply.

Nipple play

Using pegs on my nipples was the forerunner to the introduction of nipple clamps. Nipple pain for me was a sure fire way of getting me to orgasm, and then some. There was a clear channel between those nipples and my clit. It still exists but having only one nipple things are a bit different, but I digress.

The other thing about using pegs or nipple clamps is that while having them in place is painful, it is their removal that causes pain. But that pain is somehow quite delicious and can last for quite some time.

Master hasn’t used pegs for nipple play, he uses them for something altogether more evil. The Zipper.

The Zipper

Around 8 pegs have been joined together by string, and these applied to the lips of my pussy. Then an evil sadist comes along and pulls the string and off come the pegs. This is absolutely fucking painful. And amazingly fabulous at the same time. This photo was taken early in our relationship, the first few weeks. You’ll see I was shaved, and soon after was instructed to grow my hair. Also there are marks! As I wrote in my previous KOTW I really hardly ever mark! Also look at that post for a glimpse of nipple clamps being used elsewhere!

We haven’t used the zipper for sometime and I don’t wasn’t to make suggestions that I might live to regret but actually it would be good to get to that place again. Yep, pegs in kink play are a damn good thing, plus they are cheap. Plus if really necessary you can even use them later to hang your clothes out too dry. Though maybe not if they are tied together with string!

Pain, marks and a new club

I am kneeling on the bed my ankles in a spreader bar. There is a clamp attached to my labia. My wrists are cuffed.

The Tell Me About prompt this week is pain and for obvious reasons that fits well with the Kink of the week on which is marks. I always live in hope that when we go out to a play event that I’ll come back with some marks. Sadly, that really never happens. It’s a shame, because yesterday we went to an event at a new (to us) club. I was able to appreciate some pain, but have no marks to show. So, here is my take on all three.

Pain

I’m not a fan of pain in the general run of real life. I hurt my knee before Christmas (fell over while dancing!) and it is still giving me pain. In that fall I sustained a bruise on my arm which is only just fading. But impact play is different, just without the bruises. This pain, has been distressing at times and has made sleep difficult, it is nothing like being beaten with a flogger.

Bent over the bed or a bench, my bottom bare, I’m ready to receive some pain. Master has a bag full of implements and is always buying something new. I prefer a softer implement that gets stingy when used than something hard and stiff. Certain materials are definitely more painful than others and especially if they are made to resemble a plastic barbed wire. He has something like that and damn well uses it.

I prefer impact to my bottom these days, but there have been times when Master has used his toys on my pussy and even breasts. Though more gently. I’m not planning to have any play on my breast what so ever now. My relationship with my remaining breast has changed, but I’m sure we’ll explore that more over time.

In the main then, I like pain inflicted with a toy designed for the purpose. I often moan and complain but that doesn’t mean I don’t like it. I’ve never used my safeword during impact play and that is probably because he is a good judge of when to stop.

Marks

As mentioned above, I really don’t mark. Well I do, but not on my bottom during impact play. Yesterday’s session was a good half an hour long, but today nothing. I can feel where his toys have hit me, it’s a bit sore. But there are no marks.

But if I walk into a door or table or trip then I have a massive bruise. It doesn’t seem fair. The places I have marked through play are my inner thighs and breasts. But as I mentioned above I am not keen any more to have my remaining breast treated in a way so as it might mark. So I’ll just put up with pain and no marks.

A new club – atmosphere matters when playing

It’s no coincidence I’m writing this post today. I was hoping (since I always hope) that I’d be able to share some photos of my marked bottom. Sadly that isn’t the case. But I do feel the need to write about the impact of an environment during a play session. Yesterday we finally managed to get to a club not too far away that run’s a monthly Sunday event. For reasons of our social life, we haven’t managed to attend before. So, were quite excited at the prospect when we realised we would be free yesterday.

The venue is located along a busy road, but hidden from passing traffic. This makes it excellent for access. Inside there seems to be plenty of space, a veritable rabbit warren of play areas, a hot tub, large bar area etc. There was vac play going on, something I’ve tried before.

The club was very busy, the carpark almost full. If lockers are allocated by number from 1 we were 93. This meant there was a lot going on. A great vibe of friends meeting and chatting. Certainly the bar area and other seating was very much like a munch. But one where people are wearing fetish gear or close to naked. I wore a leather bodice and spanking skirt. I’m pleased to say that the bodice did up tighter than last time – I’ve lost several inches from my upper body.

The main drawback was that there were few places available to play at any time. One room contained a couple of spanking benches, and also lounging, bed areas. We spied a vacant bench and got down to business. The trouble was it was noisy. People carried on speaking at the top of their voices, or so it seemed. A conversation about different floggers took place, and someone showed others his wares. There was discussion about leather vs plastic when you are vegetarian. Then in the middle of our play time, a couple began to have sex (very loudly) in the middle of the room.

I struggled to get into my zone, and I think I took quite a bit of pain without necessarily feeling it. In the end we stopped not because we wanted to, but because it was just too distracting.

We know we need to go back for another visit to see whether this club is for us. Perhaps it being so busy was a one off. Perhaps we were just unlucky with where and when we chose to play. We often play at the beginning of the event, but this time didn’t arrive till well over an hour in. But all in all, it was a bit unsatisfactory for us. Plus I came away without a mark!

Click below to see who else is participating in Kink of the Week and Tell Me about

It’s Halloween

The current Kink Of The Week prompt is witches (plus otherworldly creatures) especially timed for halloween. I had started to write a witch themed post about the All Souls Trilogy, which I have recently read (and loved). But the very arrival of halloween has reminded me that this is one ‘holiday’ or ritual I detest. So, I feel compelled to rant about halloween and leave the book review for another day.

I don’t think I have ever dressed up for halloween, nor been to a halloween party. If I ever did it would probably be as a witch. Though, having said that I’m pretty sure I never will. You see I just don’t get the point. I love a party and have even worn fancy dress on a few occasions but never on or around 31st October. All Hallows Eve doesn’t seem worth celebrating and certainly not going outside on a cold and wet evening for. Even if chocolate is involved!

The origins of Halloween

Samhain was the Celtic celebration to celebrate the harvest and welcome the darker part of the year. On that night the barrier between spirit and human worlds thinned and spirits and fairies could be seen. Bonfires were lit, people dressed up and offerings were made to the gods. Places were set at tables so the souls of the dead could be welcomed home.

31st October, 1st and 2nd November are important dates in the calendars of many countries. Some on a more spiritual level than others. This includes visiting cemeteries on All Souls Day to bring flowers, clean graves etc. They too will often have partied the night before, wearing costumes. But each to his own.

Trick or Treat

As far as I was aware this was very much an American custom and one which definitely needs to be restricted to children under the guidance of adults. This is one time I have relented and hosted a small children’s party when my son was young. Two cousins a neighbour and my son dressed as ghosts, skeletons and witches was fun. The neighbours happily filled their bags with treats. Other times I have gladly bought and given out sweets and chocolate, then eaten what’s left.

But that’s where my line is drawn; teenagers with thoughts of mischief can keep away, no matter how well dressed they are. Adults in this country of course are more likely to be seen in a local pub dressed in a questionable costume and covered in fake blood.

It turns out that from the Middle Ages until the 1930s there was a kind of treating known as ‘souling’. Groups of soulers – catholic and protestant – went around silently begging for cakes in return for prayers for loved ones. This kind of practice took place in other parts of Europe too, so maybe trick or treating originates this side of the Atlantic.

Things that irritate include:
  • Scary films have to be released on Halloween – why?
  • The shops are now full of costumes, pots to put treats in, decorations, specially designed treats and other ways to make them rich and us poor.
  • A high level of plastic is involved when we are cutting down. Though I guess you can reuse some of it.
  • Costumes often seem tenuously related to halloween. Some people think it’s ok to just put white makeup on their faces and say they are a ghost or spook. Give me a well dressed witch with stripy stockings, hat and big nose any day.
  • People changing their social media names to include something halloween related (apologies if this is you).
  • Halloween is the gateway to Christmas in the UK. By tomorrow the shops will be putting up trees and playing ‘Merry Christmas Everyone’

So in conclusion. I’m not a lover of Halloween, I haven’t decorated my house with bats and cobwebs, I’m not dressing up and I am not expecting to welcome trick or treaters.

I love a good scary book or one about witches and vampires. I love a scary film and like fancy dress parties. But these things can be done any time, not just at halloween.

Last year’s post, where I said something similar in fewer words is here

Electric

He used the violet wand on me from the first time we played. I held a respect for all things electric that made it difficult for me to quite trust the wand at first. My dad was an electrician and the idea of someone torturing me with an electric current scared me a little. Even now, I find it somewhat scary.

But there is no doubting that the violet wand is an amazing bit of kit. It works by turning the electrical current into a low watt, high frequency charge like static electricity. And that is exactly what it feels like when the wand attachments touch my skin. It’s just that it’s a continuous flow of static rather than a short burst.

Soon after we met we attended a workshop at Birmingham Bizarre Bazaar which helped me understand how it all worked. It also helped seeing other subs having the wand used on them. Even so, I still feel a bit anxious when Master is using the wand.

Having said that, the tingling feeling as he brushes the wand attachment over my bare skin is quite wonderful. I find it more relaxing if I am blindfolded and then I start to enjoy the feelings. Since I tend to try to jerk my limbs out of the way, then restraint is also a good idea.

He runs a comb attached to the wand through my hair, brushes down my body, paying attention to my nipple piercing. That often does give me a little jolt. Then onwards down my torso, arms and legs. Combined with other stimulus such as from a vibrator, my nerve endings come alive and somehow I become aroused.

When Master uses the violet wand on me, it is just one of a series of sensations he creates. A small element of the process of pain and pleasure.

This is what I wrote in February 2014 after one of my first experiences:

During that session there was cock worship, there was spanking with various implements, and there was ‘the zipper’ (lots of pegs on my pussy this time which are at an opportune moment quickly pulled off all at once). There was also the violet wand which I both love and hate as the electrical stimulations are painful but in a very erotic way. There were nipple clamps, there was the bit in my mouth and as always there was the hitachi. And there was sex too, particularly the anal sex which always has an effect on my emotional state. But also there was lots of touching – Him touching my body and me his.

Feb 2014

Sadly we haven’t played with the violet wand much in recent times. I know that by writing this, something is highly likely to happen! After all, Master reads all of my blog posts!

The joy of summer

I absolutely love summer and in particular the part of summer where the days are at their longest and the nights, their shortest.

I married in June, on 23rd. The closest Saturday to midsummer. I even tolerated night duty when it fell in the summer. It was amazing looking out on the streets of London and into the sky that never properly darkened. For many years, I only holidayed in June. Everything everywhere remains fresh, even those places that by August are sunbaked and dry. Of course, England often offers a different kind of June midsummer. But even in the rain, there is the wonder of beautiful flowers, green fields and always a long day to behold.

These days, summer holds a whole new meaning for me. It is about stripping off the clothes (more now than before perhaps) and so being more available. Also it is about feeling more like having sex, not just in the morning but other times in the day. When I was working, summer offered up the chance of a week or two away and an opportunity for afternoon sex. Even last year that was the case.

Now, we can have sex anytime, but for some reason, summer has brought with it new opportunities. Yesterday morning, we set the alarm for an early flight. I was awake long before necessary and suddenly, as the sun rose around 5am Master and I were having the most amazing sex. Summer this year has also provided an opportunity for a resurgence of our M/s dynamic. A time to be alone without outside interference and to reflect on what we want from our relationship.

We travel a lot, but for some reason, summer has provided us with the opportunity and the means to actually put our thoughts and desires into action.

Of course not everything about summer, and even in the sun is good. Here think sunburn and mosquito bite, also hot nights where you can’t sleep and any idea of sex would be just too steamy.

But give me summer over any other time of the year. You can keep the cold of winter, the flowers of spring and the leaves of autumn. I’d go for the long days, hot nights and fun of summer any day. If I were getting married again, I would still choose the romance of the middle of June. Always and forever.

Summer holidays give us the chance to sit around (semi) naked. Master took advantage of that today!

Swinging

The idea of going to a club, getting off with and having sex with someone else has never really appealed to me. Nor has meeting up with someone on a casual basis for sex, even if my partner were fully aware. This maybe seems strange, given I cheated on my husband and started more than one relationship with other men. I don’t think swinging is nor will it ever be right for me. But, I guess I need to unpack that a bit.

I’m not sure I’m cut out for casual affairs

I like to get to know people, find out how they tick before I head to bed (or wherever) with them. I prefer my relationships to involve emotional feelings, not just lust. And if I met someone that I connected with then it wouldn’t be casual. I know that I am monogamous and can’t see that changing. Having said that, when I met Master there was the possibility that it might have ended up being a casual thing. But that says more about my state of mind at the time than anything. But, I digress.

Equally I am pretty sure I’d be jealous if Master wanted to sleep with other women. But also I know that he would be unlikely to want to have sex for the sake of it. This gets to the crux of who we are and the kind of relationship we have.

We are Dominant and submissive, Master and Slave

We go to a club that most of the time is for swingers. But we attend on days when the focus is dominance and submission. Sex takes place at those parties too, perhaps some of it is swinging, but that isn’t why we are there. For us, it is an opportunity to access space and equipment we don’t have at home. I admit there is a certain amount a lot of excitement in playing in public – seeing and being seen. But we don’t go there to have sex, we do that at home.

Would I play with another and would he?

Yes, I believe that both of us would if the desire or opportunity arose. While that might be on a casual basis I’m not sure it would include sex. If Master wanted me to play with or have sex with another man, then I would. But I don’t think I’d want that to take place at a club or to be on a casual basis. I’d want it to be thought through and planned. The same if he was to play with or have sex with another woman. Then of course we are back to the feelings of jealousy that might arise.

I once had a foursome that was casual

I’ve written before about the events that took place 6 years ago with S. We met another couple to play and have sex. It happened in a hotel room and we were all present all of the time. I had sex with both S and they other guy that evening. I had my only ever girl on girl experience and S had sex with the other woman. It was fun and extremely sexy.

It was a casual encounter in that it only happened once. But there was nothing casual fun the way it was arranged. The other woman and I spent literally months getting to know each other and a lot of time discussing what would happen.

So in conclusion

I’m not a swinger and can’t see me getting into swinging. However I would have sex / play with others at the behest of my Master. But it is unlikely that would be a casual affair.

Mirrors

I have a massive love hate relationship with mirrors. On the one hand they show me things about myself I would rather not see. The way my face is aging, where wrinkle show and hairs grow from my post menopausal face. They show me that my body bulges in places I would rather it didn’t and that my clothes fit less well than I would like. But mirrors are also a wonderful way of showing you things you wouldn’t other wise be able to. Hidden parts of your body, or a view you would need an out of body experience to see. Mirrors can also be beautiful in themselves.

Mirrors help you see yourself

Without a mirror there are many parts of your body you can’t see. Maybe you don’t want to see if your bum looks big. But being able to view your own vulva or clitoris is only possible with a mirror (or camera, but that captures a moment). Being able to watch yourself, or another touch your most intimate places is a wonderful thing. It also helps you to be able to understand your own body. Being able to feel that your clitoris is engorged through arousal is one thing, seeing it is something else.

Mirrors in self portrait photography

Other than my kitchen, the main thing I miss about my house is the mirrored doors of the wardrobes. (I miss the wardrobes too as all my clothes fitted in them). Those mirrors featured in so many of the photographs I have taken over the years. Like the one below, which is from a Sinful Sunday in July 2017.

Master is changing a lightbulb in the bedroom, standing on the bed. I am lying down and taking a picture with the aid of the mirrored wardrobe doors.
Beautiful mirrors

Often in hotels you can find the most beautiful mirrors. Especially those places where furnishings are less basic and let’s say clinical. We have had the pleasure of visiting some lovely hotels over the years and so mirror opportunities pop up frequently. The one below was taken in our room at a hotel close to where my mum now lives. That means there is every chance we’ll visit again.

It’s funny too, that when looking at myself in that mirror I probably hated what I was seeing. But the mirror is so beautiful that I had to take a picture of myself reflected in it. Next time though, I would probably move our bags out of the foreground first. That’s the whole thing with mirrors though. They very rarely lie.

The touch of our hands

The touch of his hands

I love to feel his hands on my body. When he comes up behind me and takes hold of my waist, my bottom, my breasts in both hands. Or when he strokes my leg while we sit together or even when he takes my hand in his while we watch a film. I love them all.

Best of all though is when he strokes my naked body, the feel of his fingers gently caressing my skin. A gentle, or even hard pinch of the nipple and the way he strokes my clit exclaiming that I am turned on. He feigns surprise and I smile at him in agreement; who would have imagined his touch could excite in this way. I love that he wants to spend time exploring my body, knowing me in a way no man ever has before.

His hands are smooth, he doesn’t do manual work often. This is in contrast to the hands that touched me before. There is nothing wrong with rougher hands, they tell their own story. But I like these, love them in fact. He slides his fingers inside me and then tastes them, he says he loves the scent and taste of me.

I don’t even mind when he touches my feet. I used to be much more ticklish than I am now. Sometimes I sit at one end of the sofa and he at the other, he holds my foot and strokes the instep. I find it arousing.

The touch of my hands

There was a time when he didn’t like to be touched. At the beginning it had been a while for him. But I don’t think that is all it was. While he has always liked to hold hands and to touch me he found me touching him unnerving. He only really liked it if he saw my hands land on him. He loves his nipples squeezed and rubbed when we have sex, that was the start. Now I am able to touch his arms, tummy, legs. Of course his cock was always a different matter he loves that, always did.

I like to touch and stroke him with my fingers, but even now there are times when he prefers I don’t. However he doesn’t complain if I kiss instead. Lips on lips, cock, his neck or nipples. Touch is important and touching him is what I like to do.

I don’t touch myself as much as I once did, particularly in the vulval area. Thus is partly because I have him there to touch me instead. Sometimes he tells me to touch my pussy, instructs me to show him how I make myself come. I enjoy doing this in a way I never imagined I would.

I do stroke my breast and where my other breast once was. This helps to remind me of what I still have but also because I like the feel of it. The softness of my own body, the way it feels different when I touch myself rather than he touches me is always interesting to acknowledge.

Our hands. The way we touch ourselves and each other are an important part of our sexual relationship. Perhaps more important than I previously recognised.

February Photofest

Mutual masturbation

Warning – Image NSFW

As I wrote here in 2016, mutual masturbation has become a part of my life that is different from what happened before. Now that we live together, all elements of our sex life have moved onto another level. There is more sex and more masturbation. Plus there is more time for fun and games while masturbating.

Slave to the machine

We lay in bed. I was browsing twitter, blog comments, the news. Regular stuff. He was looking at porn, while stroking himself, almost absent mindedly. Or so I thought. Suddenly he turned to me and told me he wanted me to fuck the machine. I was comfortable, warm and happy doing what I was doing, but the idea did appeal. Plus, cock in hand, he was half way out of bed. I rushed to get the machine from the room next door and within moments was hovering above the condom covered dildo. Briefly I stroked my slick vulva, already wet with anticipation and then sat down on the silicone cock. It felt good.

“Go on girl, fuck the machine” He grinned, perching on the end of the bed. I rocked, using the handle to help me ride the thing like a rodeo horse. The dildo moved in and out of me as I rode forward and back. All the time he was stroking himself, and egging me on. He told me I was a slave to the machine, and so I was.

Reaching for his camera, he told me to look at him. It was easy to see that he had me just where he wanted me. I was on the edge of orgasm, the pleasure seeping from every orifice, the pleasure showing in my face. Photos of my face would show me heavy eyed, lustful, lost in my submission as I listened for instructions. The photos he took showed something else, though expressive in themselves.

Afterwards he fucked me on the bed. As is often the case, our masturbation session led to sex. And orgasms.

February Photofest
Wicked Wednesday... a place to be wickedly sexy or sexily wicked

Knickers to that!

There was a time in our relationship that I rarely wore underwear when we were together. It was one of the things that Master requested of me from the start. Going out with nothing underneath my clothes in summer feels thrilling and cool, literally. If a breeze catches your skirt and travels upwards, it can be very pleasant and even arousing. Similarly being braless is comfortable, not just in summer but when sitting around the house relaxing. Kink of the week is about knickers, so here goes.

Functionality

There are times when wearing knickers is about being functional. For example, under jeans. I don’t find it particularly comfortable to be bare under my jeans and so will generally wear knickers underneath. Plus, I like them to be comfortable, so they will usually be something with a bit of substance rather than a G-string.

Speaking of which, while I own thongs and G-strings, I rarely wear them. They can be damned uncomfortable and don’t prevent chafing so you may as well go without.

When wearing leggings I tend not to wear anything underneath. Partly to avoid a VPL but also for comfort and practicality. No need for knickers in my opinion.

Mixing and matching

I own many pairs of knickers, a whole drawer full and I also have lots of bras. Most of them don’t match each other. While I change my knickers every day, I admit I don’t change my bras. Plus, the complicating factor of my recent mastectomy, means I can’t wear most of my bras right now. So I currently have 2 bras with matching knickers. So the chances of my underwear matching at the moment is slim.

For that special occasion I will make sure I am wearing something that matches, unless of course I am gong commando.

Naked under my clothes

As mentioned above, there was a time when I rarely wore underwear when we were together. Gradually that changed. Mainly for practical and comfort reasons of reasonably big boobs plus chafing during hot weather. In the winter if wearing tights, I may as well wear knickers too. What’s more, this winter, since I’m not working I tend to wear trousers, jeans or leggings most of the time.

But once the weather improves (and when I go on holiday) I plan to make a concerted effort to leave my knickers off. We have been discussing how to reintroduce some of those past rules now we are together all of the time. And this wouldn’t be a bad one to reintroduce. Not wearing a bra won’t be easy for now, but not wearing knickers will. Another resolution for 2019 perhaps.