Other than January Jumpstart, Journal is the only category beginning with J. I started this blog in April 2012 (apologies for my mistake in previously saying I was coming up to 9 years, it’s 8). I started the blog to journal my progress from dull married housewife to exciting submissive. Though I didn’t really know at the time what that even meant.
Those early days
Never having been good at keeping a written diary going I decided to write about my adventures on a blog. I was no stranger to blogging because I kept one related to work and had used it to provide evidence for my Masters. This though was much more personal. But as usual for a journal, there were plenty of down days as well as exciting interludes. Obviously I longed for it to be the other way round. But unlike written diaries where I got bored after around February, this continued. I filled the spaces with the memes of the time. Mainly 30 days of this and that. At the same time I was reading vociferously so what I didn’t experience in real time could be read about.
Being found out
When my ex discovered my treachery I suddenly had a place to vent. To describe my day to day life. I rarely read it back now as it is painful. But I would never delete because they are important times in my life. As I have said recently, I sometimes come across a post that reminds me why I started on this journey and that it was right to do so.
I’m pretty sure that if I hadn’t already been writing about my life on my blog, Master would have asked me to start some kind of journal.
I never felt that I shouldn’t share this space with him, testament perhaps that I trusted him from the start. He read every post I’d written early on and has always said it helped him identify my needs as a submissive. He would often ask me questions about certain posts to clarify things in his mind.
While this primary slave was around it was important to write. She messed with my head and ultimately ended her own relationship with her crazy antics. My blog became a place of sanctuary until she found it and I shut up and then moved.
Not so many of my posts these days could be described a ‘journal’. There isn’t a big need for it. The last time it really helped was when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I even managed to post the day following surgery. Important to look back on now as a diary or journal post.
While I have little need of my blog being a daily journal there is no way of knowing when this might be a need. So, my blog will always be ready to be turned into a journal. At the drop of a hat.