How did you first become aware of the blogging community?
My first blog was about nursing and working for the NHS (UK health system). It started as somewhere to document some of the growing disgruntlement some of us were feeling as well as documenting what was going on. Soon after I started a Masters course and began to write posts that were reflective and which I could use as part of a journal. Once I had finished my course my interest waned and posts were sporadic.
In 2012 I decided to start another blog – World of joolz – as a way of recording my journey in my new and illicit relationship. I never envisaged that blog would lead to this one and the relationship I have now. Shortly after starting that blog, I deleted my work related one. It was difficult enough being anonymous on one blog, but nigh on impossible on two. Especially if anyone worked out both were written by the same person. I regret deleting and wish I had just taken it offline.
What made you decide to take the plunge and join in?
In both cases I began to read other blogs and decided I would like to write my own. Because I was used to commenting on other blogs, I was bolder with the kink one and so attracted followers quite quickly. In both cases I felt part of a (very small) community and enjoyed the interaction. I am still friends on Facebook with a couple of nurses from those early days.
As time has gone by, I have interacted much more with the wider kink / BDSM / sex blogger community. Twitter was probably the thing that led to my small circle widening to the extent it is today. My blog isn’t the most widely read, but lots of people know about it and me.
How did you decide on the type of content you would share?
My blogs have always been about a personal journey or way of recording events. In the past 2 or 3 years I have joined in much more with memes like this one, and sometimes that has taken me in a different direction. I would like to write more fiction, but don’t find it easy. There are so many people out there with more creativity and better writing skills than me. I enjoyed participating in the Smut Marathon, but am undecided about next year.
To begin with, preserving anonymity was very important as I didn’t want to lose my job. So I was careful not to give locations or information that might identify me. While this is still the case, I am much more willing to show my face and to be more open.
Have you achieved the goals you wanted when you started blogging and have these changed over time?
From time to time, I remind myself that the blog is about me, about my relationship and journey and pull back slightly from everything else. I didn’t have any particular goals, but was on a voyage of discovery. I would say I have been successful in that. I have learned so much about myself as a person and have been able to see myself grow as a submissive for example.
Master reads everything I write and often reads old posts, they are often points of discussion for us.
What have been the most positive aspects of being a blogger?
In the early days of my kink journey I read many submissive and slave blogs, in particular. They helped me to work out the things I wanted to try on my journey as well as those I definitely didn’t. They were where I learned about TTWD (the things we do) and that no two relationships are, or need to be the same.
The best thing has been meeting other people through blogging as well as engaging regularly online. At the weekend I met Indie who is in the UK at the moment and who I would never have met if it hadn’t been for blogging.
Have there been any negative aspects of being a blogger?
Sometimes you can put pressure on yourself to participate in everything. Finding time to write is difficult enough, but visiting other blogs and participating is difficult. I love to get comments, and feel I should do the same, that is time consuming. But it is enjoyable.
Wonderful to read . . . and you are so right that “no two relationships are, or need to be the same” . . . but it is lovely sometimes to take strength and confidence from knowing that others have similar desires and experiences.
Xxx – K
I often find that convincing myself that others want to hear what I have to say to be the most difficult part of blogging, but then you read the comments people leave and you realise it was worth it after all.