Kink and Limits
There is a place on Fetlife where you can list your kinks or as described there, fetishes. Those available range across the spectrum of those related to domination and submission, through pain, degradation, humiliation and so on. Just reading through posts there, blogs, books and comments on social media it’s possible to find out about those kinks and how people fulfil them.
What is clear, is that everyone is different. What works for one person, couple or group really doesn’t for others. But just because you come across something you wouldn’t want to do yourself, doesn’t make them wrong. Nor does it mean you have to want to try everything, after all everyone has limits.
My approach all along this journey has been that I have a few very hard limits when it comes to kink. Thankfully most of those are the same as Master, which makes life easy. These include blood, scat and anything completely illegal. I have one that I described to him at the beginning of our relationship that he has respected. It might seem odd, but I will not dress up in any nurse / medial related out fit. I am a nurse and as such will not bring my own profession into disrepute by degrading the uniform. I have no problem with others dressing as a sexy nurse, I am just not doing it.
All other limits I might have, or have had in the past are soft. This made it easy to give up decisions about those limits to Master once we agreed our power exchange relationship. He has a number of kinks that aren’t necessarily mine, but I am happy to embrace them. One of those would be water sports. Given a choice I wouldn’t initiate peeing on him or being peed on, but have to admit I don’t dislike it.
My journey to submission, slavery and kink has been one of great learning. We have explored our fantasies as well as things we knew we enjoyed. There have been things we have done once or twice and not repeated, and there are others we rarely do but would like more time to explore.
The fun and enjoyment we have together in the bedroom or play room are part of what makes our relationship special. It stops life getting dull and helps us learn more about each other along the way. I am glad I found kink and explored my limits and that I have him to help me do so.
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I like the phrase you use, “explored my limits”.
So often when I read of people discussing limits, it feels as though limits are viewed more as boundaries encountered, something that one person lays down and the other person either stops at, or attempts to persuade one past. I much prefer the feeling given by “exploration” – it makes a limit much more of a space you work in together, testing and seeing how it goes.
I hope that made sense because you have no idea how long it took me to grapple that explanation out of the fuzzy depths of my brain! (What letter day is it today?)
It makes perfect sense. I have always viewed it as something we are doing together.