What’s my name?

5 years ago, when I embarked upon this journey, one involving illicit sex with a bit of kink thrown in. I called myself Joolz on the various websites and on my new blog. The people I met at that time either didn’t know my real name or chose not to use it. To them I was Joolz.

But when Master and I met, 3 and a half years ago now. He saw me as someone else. To him Joolz was someone who was a bit scary, who had been struggling to find her true self. Joolz was someone in transition from Julie to……….. But who.

He wanted me to refer to myself as ‘this girl’. As far as he was concerned, my journey as a submissive needed to include some introspection about what and who I was. By removing the need to think of myself in the first person or as Julie the mother or daughter, the submissive inside would feel more real. At the same time he was of the opinion that Joolz was someone who had belonged to another, someone who had rejected me. By letting go of Joolz, I let go of that part of my past. Gave myself fully to him. Allowed myself to be absorbed into his ownership, to become his property.

Gradually over time this girl has become girl. He called and does call me girl. At times he has admitted that he has struggled to remember that I am also Julie. A 55 year old girl? Yes, but not any girl. His girl, his submissive and his slave. I do still refer to myself as ‘this girl’ but mainly during sex or play. The rest of the time I just know who and what I am, even when people call me Julie. I know I am His girl.

TMI Tuesday – Sex on the Brain

Sex on the Brain

1. Is a weird “sex face/orgasm face” a total deal-breaker?

I am of the opinion that once you get to the point of orgasm, then your face is likely to demonstrate true emotions much more than anything you say. If someone’s expression is a little weird at that point then so be it! Anyway who is paying attention to that kind of thing unless they are on film and that is something else entirely.

2. Do you enjoy having your balls played with (or playing with balls)?

I have no balls, but enjoy playing with Masters balls during sex.

3. Have you ever hooked-up with somebody based on their proximity to your smartphone location (Tinder, GRINDR, etc)?

Nope. Never used Tinder, though my son met his fiancé that way. We did meet online however. I guess the fact we met in a chatroom makes us old school!

4. You have some free-time in the workday–blow job or intercourse? (BJ can be giving or receiving).

Gosh, this has never happened. I guess giving a blog job would be easier, quicker and less likely to affect my ability to get through the rest of the day……..

5. How long after having sex with a new partner do you have to wait before falling asleep?

I think that when we first had sex we both drifted off afterwards. Mind you it was a little more than straight sex. That was 3.5 years ago so must qualify in the new bracket.

Bonus: What’s the dirtiest or sexiest text message you’ve ever received?

In the early days some of his texts to me included instructions about what to wear or do. That hasn’t happened for a while. Most texts these days are direct and functional!

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday

3 Responses to TMI Tuesday – Sex on the Brain

  1. Great answers. It’s good to see another individual from the BDSM lifestyle on TMI…

  2. fondles says:

    Here i am 🙂 I’ll add you to my roll. (weren’t you already there tho? technology escapes me sometimes.)

  3. Julie says:

    I moved. I know technology escapes me too! xx

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A new day, a new year

Today is my birthday, and as I enter a new year of life I somehow find myself ready to blog again. The past couple of months have been somewhat quiet here. Save the occasional, writers block post Sinful Sunday has been my only regular offering.Last week’s Sinful Sunday post, a spur of the moment shot of Master changing a lightbulb naked  was rated in the top 5 by Molly. It is those kind of shots that really are the best. Therefore this week, since I have taken no photo involving stairs (this week’s prompt) I am taking a rest.Instead I am happy to report that our sex and M/s life is resurrecting itself. Or rather, perhaps we are finding the time to get it going again. Since holiday we have been busy. Weekends away, stuff to do around the house and garden. Plus we both seemed to have returned from holiday with a strange malaise that wouldn’t seem to shift. Master has a painful shoulder, which I hope he will seek medical help for soon. This weekend though, we have shoved all of that aside.

Two mornings in a row we have had sex. Raw, just woke up and wanted to grope and kiss each other sex. Yesterday, my eyes were barely open before I found myself on my knees before him, sucking his cock. This morning I was awake first, reading birthday messages on Facebook when He began to finger my clitoris. Then he went down on me, orgasms flew through me in a way that I haven’t experienced in months. Mindful of his shoulder pain I have been on top more than of late. I had almost forgotten how wonderful that feeling is, his control from beneath me is something to behold.

As recently as Friday I was wondering if I was still his submissive bitch. Something in the things I said, and my body language that night seem to have seemed through. To us both. We have reminded ourselves of who we are to each other and that feels really good.

Sinful Sunday will resume here next week, meantime if you read this please do click on the lips and see the great photos everyone has contributed this week. But for me, today I will enjoy my birthday and savour the thoughts of yesterday, this morning and all the days to come.

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