Insomnia by proxy and other ramblings

According to Wikipedia, insomnia or sleeplessness is the inability to fall asleep or to stay asleep. Thankfully, it is not something i suffer from all that much. i have to be pretty anxious and wound up before it stops me sleeping. Sadly this is not the case with my husband; he both struggles to get off to sleep and then after just a few hours he wakes. Some may say that this is sure to be all my fault, after all i have put him through some rough days and nights over the last 2 months or so. But actually this has been a frequent problem, probably exacerbated by his fear of my leaving and further ruining his life. Plus my snoring (yes folks, in this house the snorer is me)

Don’t get me wrong, i am sympathetic. But actually it is hard to be all that amenable to his needs when my own sleep is  so disturbed. This very morning i noticed his absence when his alarm went off at 5.15 and Liza Minnelli told me that ” life is a cabaret old friend”. Not from where i was lying it wasn’t. Hubby was no where to be seen, and had been downstairs reading for sometime. i haven’t slept since and it is now 7.20. Still there is a silver lining, all this at least gives me time to read more blogs. Plus time to try to work out msn / live messenger or whatever it is called. Sir has met and is getting to know some new friends there and i have been trying to join in, but getting very frustrated along the way.

He has some very grand, and very very kinky ideas going on in his head. These ideas are slightly on the scary side, but extremely appealing to a kinky slut type girl (well woman of mature years). i would love the chance to discuss these potential plans, involving another couple, but that messenger thing has changed since i last used it. These days i also have yahoo and skype, so all this is a slight step too far (even though i am reasonably techy). All we are looking for is for the 4 of us to be able to have a conversation, together, all at once. So you can see how much i needed my sleep, what with all of that going on last night.

Sir and i have discussed a number of fantasies involving other people; whether it is about others watching me in my humiliation, seeing what Sir is doing to me or of course me to Him. Other times we have discussed the idea of involving others in our games. i don’t yet know what he fully has in mind (since i was too frustrated for a meaningful conversation last night) or indeed if we will all get on. But this feels like a whole new phase to things. What is more He is very excited and i love him excited!

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