i have always known that there is a fine line between something that is pleasurable and something that is unpleasant, painful even. That sometimes you have to endure a little pain in order for the pleasure to be revealed. The pain of childbirth for example, which is immediately followed by the overwhelming feeling of pleasure as you hold your baby in your arms. But before i began on this journey, i had little experience of pain in a sexual sense. i had little idea that my body would respond in the way it does to pain.
At the beginning of our relationship, we were both a little reticent when it came to pain and Him inflicting it on me. We had anal sex pretty much immediately, and that was a little painful in the first instance, immediately giving way to pleasure. But Master didn’t rush to spank me or cause me pain in any other way. That has come gradually as we have explored my limits and He has grown to recognise my needs.
One of my first experiences of the pain / pleasure duo was when i put clothes pegs on my nipples, during a telephone conversation with Him. He could immediately tell i was finding the experience pleasurable, even while i was still feeling pain and when we next met, He introduced nipple clamps. These have been one of my biggest sources of pleasure, and even as He puts them on my, i have an urge to open my legs wide for Him as my pussy gushes forth. Squeezing and biting my nipples has a similar effect, very useful for reminding me who and what i am.
Increasingly Master is using various implements (recently a belt) to spank me and again i find the experience unpleasantly painful and wonderfully arousing at the same time. i particularly love it when he gets close to my pussy with the swipes of the belt which turns me on so much.
This past weekend, i found pain a great way to level me and reintroduce my mind and body to my submission. He had me telling him time and again about the slut, the whore that i am. While i could feel pain, whether from being spanked, pinched, squeezed, clamped or as his cock entered my needy body, i felt the juices flow from me, and the arousal within me. It felt like i had come home.
That is probably why i have struggled to get myself back together this week and why i am missing Him and my submission this week. i would give anything to get some pain and pleasure right now!